In Writer and Director Jon Favreau’s Star Wars: The Mandalorian and Grogu, the armored masked bounty hunter Mandalorian adopted tiny Grogu, who’s powerful with the Force, as his son. He protects Grogu with his life. The Mandalorian is samurai. Baby Yoda Grogu, saved the mortally wounded Mandalorian, played by Pedro Pascal, saved his Father. Thankful, the Mandalorian said, “The old protect the young, and then the young protect the old. This is the way.”
One of the Greatest Samurai, Miyamoto Musashi said, “Once you understand the way broadly, you can see it in all things.” In the way broadly, I see that the young protect the old. That is the way. It doesn’t matter where I start in life. The past is the past. Lady MacBeth said, “What’s done cannot be undone.”
In training over the years, I can see the way broadly in life. I keep moving forward, be present. When I was a little boy, Dad scared the hell out of me. Whatever I did or didn’t do only made him so angry with me. I never knew which. I only knew I was not the son, Dad wanted. I embarrassed him. I was not good enough for him. Never would be. I wasn’t good enough for anyone else, including me.
I spent much of my adult life proving that I was good enough, good enough for Dad to love me. However, being more of anything would never be good enough. That’s the human design. That’s just life.
I’ve trained in Aikido with the late Mizukami Sensei and Ishibashi Sensei for over 35 years, well over half my life. The late Mizukami Sensei taught both Ishibashi Sensei and me before he passed away. Now, Ishibashi Sensei teaches me. Mizukami Sensei was like a father to both of us.
Mizukami Sensei taught, “Just train. It’s not like you have to get somewhere.” For the first time in my life, I could just be me. I was good enough. Still, I could always be better, always be the greater man. Sensei created the space for me to succeed, fail, and grow from both. Just train.
Ishibashi Sensei taught me the purpose of Aikido is to release my fear. Aikido is about freedom. I free myself of me. The safest place to be under the attack, in the danger, in what I fear. I enter the attack, enter what I fear. I make my timing. I hold my position. Under the attack, in the danger, I open up. I let go my fear inside that I’m not good enough, over, and over, and over again.
When I let go my fear inside that I’m not good enough, I can protect myself and others. I become the protector. O-Sensei Morihei Ueshiba said, “True victory is victory over oneself.” It’s me against me. I’m my greatest opponent, my greatest enemy. I apply the Aikido technique no myself, not on the attacker. I work on myself, not on the attacker, not on others. I fix me. I’m the only one, who can.
Aikido is effective, when it is aesthetic (beautiful) and ethical (follows the path, budo). That way life becomes effective, too. How I make my life work. When I was a little boy, when I was young, Dad was not my protector. Still, I was his protector when he was old, until he passed away. Maybe, the old don’t always protect the young. That’s just life. Still, the young always protect the old. This is the way. Beautiful. Ethical.
In life, I work on me, not on others. I fix myself, not them. I’m the only one, who can fix myself. The past is the past. I can’t change the past. I can change myself, not others. I put my head down. Put in the work. I love myself for who I am and forgive myself for who I’m not. I know what I have and what I don’t have. Just train.
I let go my fear inside that I’m not good enough over, and over, and over again. I overcome myself, so that I can protect the ones I love. This is the way. At least, a way. May you find yours.
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Photo by Samuel Austin on Unsplash
