Everyone has to heal their own traumas. Nobody could do it for you.
There will be many people & situations that will not turn out the way you want and that will hurt you in some form or the other. There are some hurts severe than others tho, that leave a lasting impact & makes us question our self-worth.
It is hurts like these which fills one with shame, guilt, fear or self-doubt and are trauma bound. These hurts leave a lasting impact beyond our conscious understanding.
‘We often meet our destiny on the road we take to avoid it’ — Oogway, Kung Fu Panda
Is there any instance you can think of from your past which fills you with remorse, anger or regret? If so, then there is some underlying unaddressed trauma which is nibbling away on your happiness & peace (contentment).
The above quote is a window into how running away from traumatic incidents is not the solution. To heal, we will have to listen to them.
Now, think about why it makes you sad?
There are 5 stages to processing grief — denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. You can quickly jump from one stage to another but you can’t skip any stage. That’s how it is.
Before fully accepting the fact that it was an important life event that had to happen in your life (as law of nature), you will go thru the other 4 stages.
You will show disbelief that this — something like this couldn’t happen to you. When you realize that it has happened in reality, you would be angry that how could something like this happen to you, what did you do wrong. There are chances that you would want to find ways & try to justify how could it happen to you, how it could have been just a chance occurrence or way of things or somebody’s fault. And before you fully accept the nature of things, you would be truly knee deep in sadness to know that something unhappy has taken place in your life, something that ‘shouldn’t’ have happened.
And when you will slow down, take your time & see everything around you & in your life with clarity & faith, you will see the deeper meanings behind the life events or occurrences -> whether pleasant or unpleasant.
And that’s when you know that your traumas have started to heal.
If thinking about it makes you want to blame someone or yourself, know that it is an unhealed trauma.
Its immersion is the only way to let it go.
And find joy & peace within.
To a happy healing 🥂🏳
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Previously Published on Medium
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