How to Make the Honeymoon Phase Last Forever

It’s widely agreed that the initial stages of a relationship are the most exciting.

Your infatuation levels are through the roof. You make huge efforts to look your best and plan exciting dates. And, oh my, the sex…you’re at it like the world’s horniest rabbits.

It’s perfection. The only supposed downside is that it can’t last forever.

But who’s to say that’s really true?!

I’ve discovered a game plan that has kept the ‘honeymoon phase’ going throughout my last two serious relationships.

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Why the ‘honeymoon phase’ ends for most couples

There are countless online guides with advice on extending the honeymoon phase.

Give spontaneous gifts. Plan ‘date nights’. Try new activities together. Learn some new moves in the bedroom. These are some of the most common tips.

But most couples don’t find the motivation to do this.

And when we take a deeper look into human psychology, we shouldn’t be surprised.

Humans are naturally wired to get what we need from life while exerting as little energy as possible. That’s why shortcuts are so appealing to us. If we can find a low-effort way to get what we want, we’ll usually take it.

When a man realises he can still get some action without having to romance his partner, his motivation to charm her fades. When a woman discovers her man will still love her in a hoodie and sweatpants, she’ll feel less inspired to doll herself up.

They learn they can get away with being less than perfect, so their relationships turn less than perfect. This relationship is more comfortable and allows them to focus on other goals.

But the butterflies slowly disappear and leave this couple mourning the end of their honeymoon phase.

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How to keep your honeymoon phase alive

Most relationships have a ‘reacher’ and a ‘settler’. The reacher believes they’re batting out of their league. The settler believes they’re accepting someone less valuable than them.

Your honeymoon phase won’t last if you’re the settler. When you think she’s lucky to be with you, your inherent laziness will stop you putting in the effort to excite her. You’ll naturally focus your energy on more pressing issues. Of course, your partner will struggle to bring that effort if she feels the same way too.

You’ll only both be inspired to keep the honeymoon phase alive if you both think you’re reachers.

So, how do you do that?

Firstly, you’ll need a consistent self-improvement routine. Commit to building the habits that’ll make you a powerful, attractive and charismatic man. With time, this will allow you to access the women who were previously out of your league.

Give yourself time to level up and enjoy the single life before you choose a partner. Once you find one, you may feel like the reacher since you weren’t able to date this caliber of woman before. But you may well have self-improved to the point that she feels like the reacher too. This is especially common if she had to fight for your commitment during the courtship stage.

From here, the key is to not get comfortable in your relationship. Fight the urge to be lazy. Keep going to the gym. Keep exploring new ways to make money. Keep building your social circle and improving your social skills.

This doesn’t just add value to your overall life. It also inspires your partner to be the best they can be. This is partly out of fear that you will outgrow them — and you shouldn’t play into that fear or exacerbate it. Always reassure your partner of your love if she expresses this fear. But, at the same time, don’t let her stop you from continuing to level up in every way you can.

Some lazy women will try to sabotage your progress, perhaps by persuading you to skip the gym and watch Netflix with them. But, if you choose an ambitious partner, you should inspire her to want to be a better person. Hopefully, you’ll each inspire each other to want to be a better partner. This is the definition of a power couple.

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It’s not easy, but it’s worth it

Some couples come to accept the end of their honeymoon phase, believing that they’ve transitioned into a more profound and mature form of love. But one or both of them will occasionally long for the fireworks they experienced in those early stages of their relationship.

If you’d prefer your relationship to maintain its infatuation, romantic gestures and hot sex, this is the best solution I’ve found.

It isn’t easy, but the reward is a relationship that feels as exciting as the first day you laid eyes upon each other.

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If you’re the type of guy who struggles to attract or keep a woman’s attention, my book Big Dick Energy will help you. It features 12 powerful exercises to help you unleash your confident masculine energy and attract amazing beautiful women. You can learn more by clicking here or watching the video below.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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