I Don’t Care How Rich He Is…

When I started dating again, I went out with lots of men. For the most part, it was a lot of fun. Even if we didn’t have a real connection, the majority were polite and treated me with respect. I always chose a coffee date as the first date so the risk for both of us was pretty low.

Sometimes we agreed to meet again, sometimes we didn’t. In either case, the most physical contact we had was either a hand-shake or a hug.

Some of the guys I dated were quite well off. A couple were wealthy.

One guy owned a real estate company. He was impeccably dressed during our first date, with perfectly manicured hands. He’d lied somewhat about his height, but this is assumed in internet romance. Men, if they lie, do so about their height, women about their weight.

In many ways he was a good match for me. He was smart as well as wealthy. He had two engineering degrees as well as his real estate license. He had been married once before but they hadn’t had children so I wouldn’t have to deal with an ex being necessarily involved in his life. He liked Indian movies, which meant he’d be a hit with my mother. He also liked to travel — we had to put off our second date because he was flying out to Hong Kong where he had some investments. I love to travel, so, yeah!

We went out on a second date, then a third. It was after the third date that I decided he was not for me.

You see, we kissed for the first time.

He had bad breath.

I couldn’t date him after that.

Good hygiene is essential to me because I like sex. But I have a powerful sniffer and no way am I going to get nekkid with a guy who smells like a sewer.

Well, he probably wasn’t that bad. But honestly, there is no excuse to go out on a date where you might get kissed and have bad breath. I mean, how did he not take care of that beforehand?

And you figure, if he couldn’t bother to do this before a date, what would he be like in a long term relationship?

The only thing I could come up with — because he was rich, there were women who didn’t care how bad he smelled. Well, they could have him!

The thing is, for me at least, how much money a guy makes doesn’t really matter to me as long as he makes enough to support himself and isn’t deeply in debt. The first caveat relates to character — an adult should be able to take care of themselves. The second relates to security — I hate debt and would be seriously uncomfortable if I ended up hooked up to someone who had tons of it. Not that I was looking for a husband, but it does happen.

Aside from those conditionals, I could care less if the guy were a school teacher or hedge fund manager, as long as he enjoyed his job and had a passion for it. To me, passion and joie de vivre are important.

So are qualities like kindness, integrity, loyalty… if you can’t trust and respect someone, why are you with them?

As I discovered from dating the realtor, hygiene is also high on my list of must-haves.

For the men out there who need to be doused with Lysol — don’t fret. If you make enough money, there are women out there who won’t mind. For the rest of you, before you become a raving misogynist or incel, consider investing in soap and toothpaste instead.

If you think this is too picky on the part of women — ask yourself how attractive you’d find a woman who smelled like a trash heap…

Did you like this article? Clap, comment, and/or buy me a cup of coffee. Maybe I can return the favor sometime. Because we all need appreciation.

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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.

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