I’m 24 years old and I can’t stand the silence.
Something I realized recently is that I’m always surrounded by people. Even when I’m alone at home, I have to listen to something. It doesn’t matter if it’s music, podcast, audiobook or just the sounds from a TV show I’m not watching. I find comfort in their voices and music.
It’s not about being alone. I’m fine with being alone but silence… it’s something I can’t deal with.
Silence feels so strange and uncomfortable.
It almost feels scary. The moment there’s silence, you feel like there are monsters coming out from under the bed.
When there’s silence, your senses are heightened. Your heart starts to race and you’re suddenly aware of everything around me. Sometimes, it feels like there are people watching me.
You honestly don’t know what’s wrong with yourself.
Is this normal? Or abnormal? You have no idea. Nobody does.
If that’s not bad enough, you start thinking about every bad emotion you’ve ever had. The “what if” thoughts come flooding in. And out of nowhere, you’re not sure where you’re going and what the future brings.
Nobody can predict the future but I always have a plan and the tasks to complete to get there. During these moments of silence, the plan seems to crumble. Suddenly, I’m not good enough.
So, yeah, I hate silence. And it’s something I need to overcome.
If you face something similar, let’s be friends. We can get through it together.
In the meantime, feel free to listen to my Spotify Playlists:
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Previously Published on Medium
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