Practical ways to help our children with their baggage.
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One of my sons’ favorite songs is Karma Chameleon by Culture Club. When they asked me what karma meant, I gave them the basic definition about sowing seeds of good or bad that reap returns of equal measure. At some point, I will explain in detail the concept of karma, but until then my practice will be to lighten their karmic load.
As I understand it, everyone is born with a karmic veil. Who knows where it comes from or how we got it. We just have it. Some veils are thick like a heavy Mexican blanket; others are as translucent as a spider web.
Behind every veil is our True Selves, our Christ Consciousness, our Buddha Nature, our divinity. Sometimes our divinity comes shining through our veil like the sun piercing through cloud cover. Other times our veil is so thick that we might even doubt that there is a sun.
During the course of our lives, our veils either thicken or disintegrate. Our experiences and how we respond to these experiences determine what happens to our veil.
When we are exposed to attack, hostility, or cruelty, we thicken our veil; we toughen up. Like a callous on a part of our body that is constantly exposed to abrasion, a thick protective layer prevents us from seeing, feeling, and experiencing our true nature.
My goal as a human (parent) is to lighten the veil of all those around me (my children). I can do this by not adding to the thickness of their karmic veil. Any act of cruelty or aggression around children gives them reason to cover up. This is why when a child is bullied, not just the victim, but also the witnesses of the bullying lose the ability to be who they were born to be.
Obviously, I try not to act cruelly to my children. I try not to yell, “No!” I comfort them when they are crying, and I refrain from telling them to “toughen up.”
I also try not to act cruelly AROUND my children. I’ve stopped yelling at other drivers who cut me off in traffic. I try as hard as I can to refrain from arguing/fighting with their mother in front of them. I even stopped yelling at David Lee when he turns over the ball during a Golden State Warrior’s game.
Overall, I try not to crush the spirit of my children (or any child). I try to see the God light shining through their veil and cherish the opportunity I have to witness the unveiling of divinity in my life.
Photo: Kozo Hattori