Love Isn’t a Game, So Stop Playing.

The other day, I saw an article about “The Gold Digger Test,” where men set up ladies to cover the full cost on dates, then pull back to see if they’re really interested or just after the money.

Reading about it, I couldn’t help but wonder:

Where did we go so wrong when it comes to love?

Today’s dating world feels more like a minefield than a curious search for connection.

Instead of showing up with open hearts and trust, people set traps, watch for signs, play games, and test intentions like suspects in an interrogation.

The idea that someone would deliberately bait another person to “prove” their worth is concerning. What message does this send?

Even when someone passes these tests, how do you think they feel knowing they were set up, observed, and judged from the start?

That alone breaks trust before it’s even built. True connection cannot grow from a soil that was already poisoned by doubt.

If you find yourself needing to bait or trick someone to believe in their intentions, maybe the problem isn’t them, it’s you.

That level of distrust suggests a wounded person to me, and maybe you’re not ready for love because you haven’t healed those wounds.

Perhaps it’s time to look inward, face your pain, and get some therapy, rather than projecting your trust issues onto others.

I’m no expert in modern dating, but I know this much: dating should be rooted in openness, trust, and safety.

I still believe in hope and romance, as naive as this may be. I believe in sweet, meaningful love stories, not in sneaky tests or mind games.

I believe in forever ever after, and choosing each other, like penguins who mate for life.

I hold close a Greek myth that we roam the earth in search of our other half, and that person is out there.

That longing, that search for connection, is the very essence of completion, compatibility, and love. None of this comes with a “gold digger test” you must pass.

Love requires two people willing to meet without armor, without agendas, who want to get to know each other, not outsmart each other.

Love is scary, yes. It’s unpredictable, and it demands a certain level of risk.

But it’s a risk you can’t manage by structuring love like an exam, or a business deal thoroughly negotiated and protected by clauses and contracts.

Love is hope, surrender, and vulnerability. You can’t fall in love while guarding your heart behind walls.

To love is to risk heartbreak (or some money taking a person on a date), and that risk is what makes love both beautiful and terrifying.

Love cannot grow from a “gold digger test.”

Love is showing up, giving freely, and acting from integrity. It’s believing in soulmates, magic, fairy tales, and happy endings.

If that makes me old-fashioned, I accept that proudly.

I’d rather be a hopeless romantic who believes in magic and eloping to a picturesque village in Tuscany, willing to hand over my heart, than to be someone trapped in a game, trying to prove my worth to a suspicious world.

Love is two brave hearts opening up and connecting, uniting together as one, even if you know that those hearts might break one day.

What’s your experience of these tests or modern dating in general? Leave a comment.