I’d like a refund on your nasty f*cking attitude, Gina.
He was maybe one of the most gorgeous people I ever wanted to pull aside, cry with and accept an engagement proposal from. His face said “wow, I bet that will never get old” and I admit that I stared at him for an unhealthy amount of time.
People say they don’t stare, but they’re pretty good at not getting caught. And when you do catch their eyes, bam, something happens. Then you catch them again and it’s just like “oh, shit, now he actually is looking at me”.
We talked. We danced. Everything was just perfect until he said he had to go to the bathroom. Five minutes later, in my tipsy stupor, I spotted him.
Of course, dancing with someone else.
I didn’t like that ugly blonde highlight anyway, asshole.
Isn’t it amazing how quickly people become unattractive? One minute you’re like “wow, you’re gorgeous” and the next minute you’re wondering how you can catch the next flight outta there.
We used to talk about attractiveness like it was a numbers game. We’d say “A 7 can easily become a 9, but a 10 can instantly be a 4.” It’s easier to start with low expectations and climb up this attractiveness ladder, so to speak.
I don’t find many people my age to be very self-reflective. So much focus on having things instead of being better people. Encouraged to conquer, but not help. Talking to people my age at the bar is absolutely nauseating.
There’s an emphasis on self-care nowadays, but I don’t think there’s an emphasis on productive self-criticism. Reckoning with our pasts, our demons and our nasty habits that manifest into treating each other like total pieces of shit.
I think about who is most attractive to me when the looks fade away. Those who are vulnerable. Working on themselves. Present. Maybe it’s true. Maybe you do find who you’re looking for when you embody those qualities yourself.
I don’t know, but it’s worth finding out.
—
Originally published on P.S. I Love You
—
◊♦◊
Here are more ways to become a part of The Good Men Project community:
Request to join our private Facebook Group for Writers—it’s like our virtual newsroom where you connect with editors and other writers about issues and ideas.
Click here to become a Premium Member of The Good Men Project Community. Have access to these benefits:
- Get access to an exclusive “Members Only” Group on Facebook
- Join our Social Interest Groups—weekly calls about topics of interest in today’s world
- View the website with no ads
- Get free access to classes, workshops, and exclusive events
- Be invited to an exclusive weekly “Call with the Publisher” with other Premium Members
- Commenting badge.
Are you stuck on what to write? Sign up for our Writing Prompts emails, you’ll get ideas directly from our editors every Monday and Thursday. If you already have a final draft, then click below to send your post through our submission system.
If you are already working with an editor at GMP, please be sure to name that person. If you are not currently working with a GMP editor, one will be assigned to you.
◊♦◊
Are you a first-time contributor to The Good Men Project? Submit here:
◊♦◊
Have you contributed before and have a Submittable account? Use our Quick Submit link here:
◊♦◊
Do you have previously published work that you would like to syndicate on The Good Men Project? Click here:
Join our exclusive weekly “Call with the Publisher” — where community members are encouraged to discuss the issues of the week, get story ideas, meet other members and get known for their ideas? To get the call-in information, either join as a member or wait until you get a post published with us. Here are some examples of what we talk about on the calls.
Want to learn practical skills about how to be a better Writer, Editor or Platform Builder? Want to be a Rising Star in Media? Want to learn how to Create Social Change? We have classes in all of those areas.
While you’re at it, get connected with our social media:
- To join our Facebook Page, go here.
- To sign up for our email newsletter, go here.
- To follow The Good Men Project on Twitter, go here.
◊♦◊
However, you engage with The Good Men Project—you can help lead this conversation about the changing roles of men in the 21st century. Join us!
◊♦◊
We have pioneered the largest worldwide conversation about what it means to be a good man in the 21st century. Your support of our work is inspiring and invaluable.
—
Photo credit: Shutterstock ID 1160748697