Should You Try to Date When You Have Low Self-Esteem?

There’s a popular saying that “you can’t love someone until you love yourself”

Maybe you’ve heard it.

This cliché might suggest that unconfident men should “work on themselves” before they try to date someone.

I think that’s BS.

You can start successfully approaching women today even if your self-esteem is in the gutter.

It’s even possible to boost your self-confidence by doing this.

But only if you go about it in the right way.

You Need To Treat Dating As A Skill

This is the most powerful lesson I learned from the men’s dating advice community:

Attracting women is a skill you can learn and improve.

Once you understand this concept, your attitude about dating confidence will turn on its head.

I used to think that attraction was based on a man’s looks, or maybe their money.

But now I understand that a man’s ability to build an emotional connection is just as important. Arguably, more so.

This is a skill that any man can improve.

The more you improve it, the more women you’ll attract, and the more confident you’ll become around them.

Why Rejections Shouldn’t Harm Your Self-Esteem

I lost all my confidence after the love of my life cheated on me.

I’d try approaching women in bars and nightclubs without any luck.

I figured this was because I was too ugly or poor to attract a woman. Each rejection damaged my self-esteem further.

But that all turned around once I understood that attracting women was a skill.

A skill shouldn’t affect your self-esteem, after all.

Most people don’t lose self-esteem if they miss a three-point shot or play a bum note on a piano. They understand that these things are skills that they need to practice more.

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Well, it’s the same when a woman ‘rejects’ you.

That rejection isn’t a reflection on you. At worst, it’s a reflection of the few minutes or seconds that you presented to her.

To be more successful, you simply need to learn to make a better presentation.

The More You Practice, The More Confident You’ll Become

As soon as I understood this concept, I began my journey of becoming a better seducer.

I learned a few canned openers;
I mirrored the basic rules of confident body language;
I used a few attention-hooking story-telling techniques.

Once I realized that this was all it took to get into conversations with beautiful women, I became more excited to start them.

Soon enough, I became confident enough to flirt, introduce physicality and invite women on a date.

The better I got at this, the more my confidence grew.

Fast forward ten years and I’m traveling the world, working as a freelance dating writer and seducing women in every country I visit.

There’s little stopping you from following a similar path.

There Has Never Been A Better Time To Learn This Skill

We now live in a society where most men are too afraid to approach women in the real world.

Instead, they rely on online dating; an image-based world where looks and money are the only things that matter.

This means you can stand out by making a smooth and respectful approach at a bar, in the park or at a coffee shop.

You’ll come across as more confident and socially-savvy just for being able to do this. You can create a real-life emotional connection that’s far more exciting than her Tinder or Instagram conversations. And that can be enough to make her choose you over all the guys sliding in her DMs.

The fact that you’re brave enough to do this should be a huge boost to your self-esteem. Most guys who witness such an approach will wish they had the balls to do the same thing.

You’ll Learn That You Deserve A Beautiful Woman

Dating is infinitely easier when you believe you deserve an beautiful woman.

When you have high self-esteem, everything seems to magically fall into place.

Your voice and body language will be on point.
You’ll effortlessly be able to find fun and interesting things to say.
You won’t be afraid to flirt or push the interaction forwards.

It all happens naturally when you believe getting together will be a win-win for both of you.

The process of approaching women and learning from your mistakes will help you get to that point.

You’ll see with your own eyes that a woman enjoys your company if you’re FUN. When you make a woman feel good around you, she’ll want to stick around.

Maybe you’ll drop the ball a few times. But you’ll see enough progress to want to try again.

Your confidence will build over time. And you’ll eventually begin to enjoy some amazing relationships with amazing women.

It’s Stupid To “Work On Yourself First”

Many self-improvement influencers are telling men to “work on themselves” for a few years before they think about dating.

This is training young men to believe that women are only interested in their appearance or wealth. And that’s simply not true.

Plus, how long will it take to become so rich, jacked or successful to turn a woman’s “no” into a “yes”? Most young men want to stop feeling lonely now, not in half a decade.

Even if you go down this route, you’ll most likely still be nervous around women if you have no romantic experience. That’ll mess things up unless you’re going for sugar babies or superficial gold diggers. So, you’ll still need to go through this process of trial and error anyway.

It’s much healthier to become confident around women by mastering the skill of flirting with them.

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The best way to build confidence is through competence. The best way to build competence is through practicing again and again.

That’s why I recommend you make approaching women a regular practice starting today.

Disclaimer: Don’t Look For Self-Worth Within Your Relationships

This guide explains how I became supremely confident at approaching women. It will help you build your social skills and charisma to excite women wherever you meet them.

But you shouldn’t stop there.

You should also learn to love yourself regardless of whether there are women in your life.

If you look for self-worth within your relationships, you’ll naturally become too desperate for positive reinforcement from your partners. This needy behavior will scare women away.

The only women who’ll stick around are equally insecure types, and that’s the perfect recipe for a toxic codependent relationship.

So, use the ideas in this article as a starting point for building your self-esteem only.

Even after you’ve started attracting women, you’ve got a long way to go.

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If you’re the type of guy who struggles to attract or keep a woman’s attention, my book Big Dick Energy will help you. It features 12 powerful exercises to help you unleash your confident masculine energy and attract amazing beautiful women. You can learn more by clicking here or watching the video below.