I have moved forward a little sense then. And my story is not a complete waste of space.
I spent about 4 months with almost full blown agoraphobia. Well I say almost because I was able to go only to the store and therapy. All other activity was shut down. I sat and tried to heal my mind in the solitude of my prison.
After awhile I decided that if I couldn’t go back to the college I would have to do something else.
If you want something different, do something different.
I reached out to my local Vocational Rehab building and learned of the Peer Support Specialist program. I worked up the nerve to get certified in that which for me at that time was a challenge.
Because it was to two different buildings at two different locations with two different groups of people.
Agoraphobia be damned.
My concerns are the same as everyone’s. Trying to make changes in my life for the better but I would be a liar if I said it did not still bother me. It does makes me think that at any moment someone will pull out a gun or something. That will makes me want to crawl into my room and not leave.
The other positive is that I have recently moved to a different house in the same town. But I am doing more to force myself out of the house. Trying to embrace change and the experiences it has with it.
Never will I be who I was before. And I am glad of that because it has taken a lot of self work to get to who I am now and truthfully it is badass.
I hope that no one reading this can relate to this story. My thoughts seem to dwell on the fact that many will. So know that there are places in every community that will have free therapy.
This is where my end began. Because it was where I started the process of finding the latch key for my cell. With every ounce of my fiber. I hope you are well and find these articles written with love and concern that you never have to make those call or have those thoughts.
Illustration by author. Used with permission.
What’s Next? Talk with others. Take action.
We are proud of our SOCIAL INTEREST GROUPS—WEEKLY PHONE CALLS to discuss, gain insights, build communities— and help solve some of the most difficult challenges the world has today. Calls are for Members Only (although you can join the first call for free). Not yet a member of The Good Men Project? Join below!
Join the Conscious Intersectionality FACEBOOK GROUP here. Includes our new call series on Human Rights.
Join The Good Men Project Community
All levels get to view The Good Men Project site AD-FREE. The $50 Platinum Level is an ALL-ACCESS PASS—join as many groups and classes as you want for the entire year. The $25 Gold Level gives you access to any ONE Social Interest Group and ONE Class–and other benefits listed below the form. Or…for $12, join as a Bronze Member and support our mission, and have a great ad-free viewing experience.
Register New Account
Please note: If you are already a writer/contributor at The Good Men Project, log in here before registering. (Request new password if needed).
ANNUAL PLATINUM membership ($50 per year) includes:
1. AN ALL ACCESS PASS — Join ANY and ALL of our weekly calls, Social Interest Groups, classes, workshops and private Facebook groups. We have at least one group phone call or online class every day of the week.
2. See the website with no ads when logged in!
3. MEMBER commenting badge.
ANNUAL GOLD membership ($25 per year) includes all the benefits above — but only ONE Weekly Social Interest Group and ONE class.
ANNUAL BRONZE membership ($12 per year) is great if you are not ready to join the full conversation but want to support our mission anyway. You’ll still get a BRONZE commenting badge, and you can pop into any of our weekly Friday Calls with the Publisher when you have time. This is for people who believe—like we do—that this conversation about men and changing roles and goodness in the 21st century is one of the most important conversations you can have today.
We have pioneered the largest worldwide conversation about what it means to be a good man in the 21st century. Your support of our work is inspiring and invaluable.