A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval
~Mark Twain
I remember junior year musical auditions.
A fucking nightmare.
I stepped out onto the stage shaking like a drug addict. As I sang, my voice shook. Most of the notes weren’t even right and as they came out, my confidence plummeted.
Something I genuinely loved became something I totally hated.
I can only dream of how I would handle those auditions now.
If I went back, I wouldn’t rely on the opinions of other people. I wouldn’t be embarrassed to actually sing (a thing that’s supposed to be fun) in front of them. I’d probably be able to relax a little bit.
Relaxing: A concept.
When we’re young, we’re obsessed with what other people think of us. Even when we’re adults, I’m not sure we do much better. No matter how many “I don’t give a fuck what anyone says about me” memes we share, most of us are still insecure.
To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.
~Denis Waitley
I go over these questions a lot to myself
- How many of us actually throw ourselves up onstage and embarrass the hell out ourselves?
- When do we talk to random people in public we don’t know?
- Do we push boundaries at work or do we stay in them?
I genuinely wonder what would happen if someone sat me down when I was younger and taught me how to be confident. And while my parents said “you can do whatever you want in life”, it sounded corny and unrealistic.
The problem isn’t that other people don’t tell us we can achieve things, it’s that we’re never taught to really believe in ourselves. To move forward with fearless self-validation.
God, I wish I did that sooner.
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Previously Published on Medium
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