Sara Crolick gains new insight on the “myth of self-discovery” inviting serious questions about her goals as an individual, her constant quest to find herself and her role as a mother.
From the time I was young, I recognized an urge to define and redefine myself. I needed to know my place in this world. How do I fit in to all of this madness? More importantly, how do I stand out?
Thirty years into this life of mine, I am still discovering, still seeking, still reinventing. As adults, we find deep seeds of authenticity from which we can grow and evolve, but the desire to develop into the most amazing version of “me” doesn’t seem to fade.
Today I witness a similar urge in my young boys, who define themselves against the forever-changing cast of characters and ideas that enter their developing minds. They’re superheroes, they’re world-famous soccer players, they’re writers—just like Mom. They’re artists, fishermen or drummers—just like Poppi.
It was only recently that I considered a downside to this perpetual reinvention. Why my constant drive to be better, to be truer, to live more authentically could create a rift in the fabric of my well-being.
As Emily Warren puts it, this makes us “treat the present moment like a place-holder.”
How earth-shattering a thought. How can we live with mindfulness and authenticity if we are forever-projecting our current selves to the future—to the next best thing? And where, then, do we draw the line? What is the difference between being focused on a personal goal and neglecting the present moment?
Emily Warren and some food for thought: