Dear Mom:
Happy birthday! I’m glad you took the day off work and made it about you.
So much of your life hasn’t been about you. It’s been about my grandmother, my grandfather, my uncle, and so many others whose needs always seemed to come first and (often) at your expense. When each got sick, you were strong. When each died, you were even stronger. You might be over 55, but I know you have many strong years left. I hope you spend them focusing on you and doing what you love.
Your life has also been about me — even well into my adulthood but especially when I was growing up. We both know I did not have much of a father, and the father I had was more like a brother than a father (and a younger one at that). We both know you often took on the role of both parents. And you know, especially, how hard this was to achieve — but you did one hell of a job and never complained.
What you may not know is how much I appreciate your hard work. You may not know how much I appreciate your willing sacrifice and the ceaseless optimism that came with it. You may not know that I see you as the top three most positive people in my life all rolled into one. Nothing seems to ever bring you down for more than a fleeting moment. I only wish that I had the same inner strength. Whatever strength I have comes from your foundation of support.
There was almost never a time when I couldn’t talk to you if I didn’t get the job or the scholarship or the validation or the appreciation — or if that girl decided she didn’t want to date me. Or if she did decide to date me, but then decided otherwise. Or if we dated successfully for a year, but then it all came crashing down. Or if I decided to stop dating altogether because it was just too damn painful. You were there.
You were there for it all — through thick and thin. You must have tallied 500 billable hours (of talk therapy) in just the last two years alone with me as your sole client. You were there for me, and you were there for anyone else in your orbit who needed a hand. I don’t know how you managed it. I don’t know how you do what you do. I couldn’t even do for myself what you have done for me.
Please enjoy the gift of being you.
Love,
Your son
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