It’s not easy to bring up struggles, disappointments or frustrations in relationships. But have you noticed that when you don’t say anything, resentment can build while spark and trust fades? In today’s episode Tony Fonderson and I discuss how to communicate in a way that creates connection rather than breaks it.
Show notes
When a date or interaction is disappointing, do you say anything?
Do you put off having conversations about challenging topics, or avoid having them at all?
What do you find scariest to talk about? Money? Sex? Desires? How you’re treated?
Many men never get the tools to make these conversations go well. But that doesn’t mean the tools do exist, and you can have the kind of conversations that make dates and relationships more connected, intimate and exciting.
On today’s Man Alive podcast I was joined by author and coach Tony Fonderson. We talked about how to communicate in a way that creates connection rather than breaks it. We give you tools to turn struggles, disappointments and frustrations into connection!
We discussed:
- How to create the safety to say what you want and ask for what you need
- Where the courage to speak about challenging subjects comes from
- How to take things your partner says less personally
- Reorienting around beliefs and perspectives that create a lot of pain for couples
- Powerful ways to notice when you’re squashing intimacy and start creating it
Tony gives you insights into how to have powerful conversations about sharing your truth in a way that creates more connection and passion!
Also, check out next week’s Essential Conversations to Build Sexual Confidence and Strong Connections w/ Women Masterclass. In this you’ll discover how to Clear the Past and Set Yourself Up for Better Love and Sex. This is important in both dating and relationships. You’ll learn to release the pain and upset women hold onto, that creates resistance or distance, and kills chemistry and desire.
I’ll show you how to help release old baggage, so a woman feels safer to open and explore with you. This is the key to creating a strong foundation for a new relationship and sex life, and for keeping your connection and sex alive. Most men are never taught to do this, and then suffer as a result, feeling like their love and sex life is out of their control.
Connect with Tony Fonderson
Tony Fonderson is a father, friend and valued guide whose natural talent is interacting with people in ways that they get the insights they need to solve deep personal problems. The son of an African diplomat, Tony grew up in multicultural environments and by the time he was 22, he’d lived in 6 different countries, had two engineering degrees, and spoke 4 languages fluently.
Tony was first introduced to the world of personal development after walking away unscathed from a near-fatal car crash with his two-year-old daughter. Although physically unharmed, he was deeply troubled by what was revealed to him during his brush with death, and this emerged to be a pivotal moment in his life.
His cosmic wake-up call led him to embark on a 20-year quest studying how life, love and relationships work, so that the next time he faced Death he could look back on a deep, rich, and meaningful life. His journey of self-discovery led him to understand that to create powerful, intimate partnerships, you must first understand who you are, and also understand what’s really going on behind the scenes.
The way Tony blends science, languages, psychology and culture makes him a sought-after source of guidance, wisdom and expert advice in matters of the heart, mind and soul.
Check out Honest Sex, a new book author Shana James.
Some say we are outgrowing marriage as a culture. However, the problem that author Shana James regularly sees as a relationship coach—and through her own divorce—is that many of us have not matured enough to create the emotionally-connected, sexually-satisfying relationships we long for.
Honest Sex teaches us what kind of honesty is effective for creating closeness, what sex actually is (rather than what we’ve been taught), and how to communicate desires and upsets to create more intimacy. By examining new ways to sustain connection with a partner, author Shana James illuminates a framework for relationships to start strong and get more intimate and exciting over time.
James is the creator and host of the Man Alive podcast and has a TEDx Talk, “What 1,000 Men’s Tears Reveal About the Crisis Between Men and Women.” As a relationship coach for 20 years, she humbly discovered the causes of disconnection and distrust in relationships, as well as how to build trust and keep passion alive. Her first book, Power and Pleasure: A Man’s Guide to Becoming a Confident and Satisfied Lover and Leader, supports men to be fulfilled in love and work. In this book, written for all genders, she uses her Master’s in psychology, DISC, and Positive Intelligence certifications to guide readers to create more honest and passionate romantic relationships.
—
Previously Published on shanajamescoaching.com