Why Adversity Will Shape You for the Better, if You Use It

About one year ago I almost gave up my blog and online writing.

Part of me was burned out after years of posting articles, cartoons, and photographs. I felt like I was on a never-ending content treadmill, and began to question the point of it all.

I was sick of the capricious social media algorithms and how they reward superficial clickbait and political rants over deeper, more elegant writing. I didn’t want to write insipid listicles, advice essays on how to gain more followers, or early morning routine testimonials.

I wanted to write elegant essays about life lessons. Poignant stories and articles informed by nearly thirty years in law enforcement, where I witnessed the best and worst of humanity.

I wanted to make people laugh, cry, and rediscover hope in themselves. And in others.

So I changed things up.

I toned down the copywriting headlines and derivative advice columns. I focused on life lessons, from my experiences and the amazing people I read about.

I even eliminated my colorful cartoons, which I knew were their own kind of attention-gathering clickbait, in favor of only black and white illustrations and monochromatic photography.

The work that ensued was more real. More authentic. It hewed closer to the kind of depth and elegance I longed to create in my writing and image-making.

And guess what happened?

I started to lose readers and make less money.

Courage doesn’t always roar

The year 2019 was a particularly good one for my online writing.

I was churning out one or two essays a week, which I illustrated with my colorful cartoons. I owed success less to my writing ability and more to the copywriting coach I hired, and to a course I took on how to gain online readers.

The copywriting tricks and algorithmic hacks I learned helped with my readership growth and income.

I was also gaining subscribers to my website newsletter, The Saturday Letters. I did some guest posts on a few popular blogs, including Joshua Becker’s Becomingminimalist.com, which got me hundreds of additional newsletter subscribers.

Changing course from all of this success was scary, but I stuck to my guns and started writing more authentic, poignant essays about life lessons.

I knew the work didn’t fit the whims of the algorithm gods, and my worst suspicions came true as I saw the reach of my essays diminish. Readers emailed to ask why I had disappeared from their feeds.

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow. — Mary Anne Radmacher

I knew the COVID-19 pandemic upended life for everyone in 2020 and attributed my continued decline in online reach to the fact more people were at home. Which meant they had options for entertainment beyond blog posts. It’s hard to compete with cat videos on Youtube and Nextflix programs.

Still, I soldiered on. Despite my declining income, I noticed that I was starting to gain more blog followers. “Perhaps my new work is finally starting to resonate?” I thought to myself.

By the start of 2021, I was beginning to doubt myself again. A negative voice began whispering “What’s the point,” into my ear.

Readers were writing nice things, but I began to question the return on investment. The hours and hours spent reading, thinking, writing, sketching, and shooting photographs didn’t produce a decent income.

I seriously considered quitting, and focusing on other pursuits.

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up

The author, entrepreneur, and performance expert Ed Mylett published the best-selling book, “The Power of One More: The Ultimate Guide to Happiness and Success.”

The book argues that we’re all closer to our dreams than we think we are. The problem is that we quit when the magic kingdom is just around the corner.

Successful people know the power of one more. Doing one more pushup than the other person. Staying one hour later. Trying one more time.

Something magic happens when we keep the promises we make to ourselves.

During an event appearance, Mylett spoke about his alcoholic father. As a boy, Mylett became an expert at studying his father for the slightest clues.

He could tell if his Dad was drunk or not simply by the way he opened the front door. If his father’s keys easily slid into the lock, he was sober. If they fumbled, he was drunk.

Mylett poignantly talks about the day his father, in tears, told him he was going to go away for a while. To try “one more time” to get sober. Because he didn’t want to lose his marriage and children.

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. — Thomas A. Edison

Happily, he did get sober. And he went on, the rest of his life, helping other people get and stay sober.

And then one day Mylett’s father became hospitalized with cancer, barely able to talk. He phoned Mylett and asked that he come to take him home. Because he wanted to be home, for one more time.

Mylett held his father’s hand back at home. His father told him how proud he was of him. And of course, Mylett was equally proud of his father. For conquering his alcoholism. And then his father slipped away.

If his father hadn’t tried “one more time” to quit alcohol, the ending would have been vastly different.

Get up one more time than you were knocked down

I don’t know if it was the encouraging comments from readers or the fighting spirit that my parents instilled in me. But for whatever reason, I didn’t give up my online writing.

I remembered something a blogging mentor of mine, Jeff Goins, once said. When asked about the key to his success, he mentioned that he stopped giving up.

Goins quit all the other blogs before his successful GoinsWriter.com.

It doesn’t matter how many times you get knocked down. All that matters is you get up one more time than you were knocked down. — Roy T. Bennett

A few days ago I received the author’s proof of my new book, “What Life Should Be About: Elegant Essays on the Things That Matter.”The book contains my best essays over the last two years. It feels amazing to hold the book in my hands.

Had I quit, the book would not exist.

Pay the price and it is yours

There’s a magical synergy that swirls in our favor when we make the right decisions. And the right decision for me was to listen to my heart and create authentic work.

There will always be hardships and adversity. If you want to move forward and find success, view them as the cost of admission.

How about you? Do you believe in Ed Mylett’s “power of one more?” Are you tired of quitting?

Are you wondering what would happen if you stuck to it? Be it your diet, your workouts, your new business, your manuscript, your marriage, etc.

Success is the child of drudgery and perseverance. It cannot be coaxed or bribed; pay the price and it is yours. — Orison Swett Marden

Yes, sometimes the thing you’re working on may require a course correction, a different approach, regroup, or modification.

The key is, just don’t quit.

Adversity will always be there. Even when the manuscript of my book was done, it took me a long time to figure out formatting, cover design, etc. At times it was overwhelming, but I was determined not to quit.

Adversity either breaks or shapes us.

Stick to your guns, stay true to your vision, evolve as needed, and remember that you might be one more try away from your dreams.

Before you go

I’m John P. Weiss. I draw, take pictures, and write elegant essays about life. Check out my Saturday Letters here.

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This post was previously published on Medium.com.

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