Why Having a Strong Emotional Foundation Is a Must for Relationships

What is an Emotional Foundation?

First, I’ll tell you what it is not. It is not sex. Probably all the men are disappointed now, but men should know that after this foundation is built, their wildest dreams can come to pass.

An emotional foundation is a series of unique experiences that are, to say the least, not something that is easily replaceable in another relationship. Experiences in the emotional foundation are things that burn within a person towards another. It is something that builds a strong connection between two. Essentially, it almost erases the possibility of having a good relationship after it, which is why most people who were in a good relationship when their spouse passed find it hard to get into another relationship. After an emotional foundation is built, the thought of starting that all over with another person is too hard.

How it Works

An emotional foundation is the opposite of sitting around and being lethargic. It is an active push to continually build a stronger and stronger connection between you and them. It is a thorough exploration of both of your worlds; finding joy in learning about each other’s passions and interests. The effort that is put into the other person is individualized and powerful. A strong interest in the person creates a powerful attraction that will not be forgotten, if it is not fake! What can you do today or this week that would blow them away and make them feel like you did doctoral-level homework just because of your relationship?

And make that a lifestyle.

Buying things is not part of the emotional foundation. But it is part of living on earth, so sometimes it is necessary. What I am talking about here are rich experiences. For those who live out in the sticks, it might be as easy as buying her a new guitar and spending a couple of nights by the lake. For women who love one-on-one time, anything authentic and outdoors with the fewest people will do the trick. And there are times when you do not leave the house at all—a rather powerfully romantic time (unless you’re not married yet, then it is best not to create this atmosphere without the whole list of things marriage is, but that’s another topic). It’s all about what means a lot to them.

After marriage, your options for building an emotional foundation increase, such as by making your home and property more personable.

When You Hit a Rough Patch

In times when life gets extra stressful, these experiences associated with the emotional foundation are what create a special motivation. These rich experiences are what speak for your ability, creativity, trust, effort, investment, innovation, commitment, and love toward your future.

Without these investments, there is no equity to receive, which can be subconsciously shown to your spouse or significant other.

It is my hope that my daughter and all those whom I influence will be able to be in a relationship they have a deep desire to invest in. Many of us know what it is like to be in a relationship that we want nothing more than to get out of. My heart desires that everyone will experience the greatness that comes with great relationships. A great relationship is just a couple committed to each other to the end. When people shy away from commitment, they show their heart’s true status.

…

Thanks for positive comments (my wife reads these before I do, if I even get time to read comments). And I usually read stories from people who clap 50x and leave a supportive comment! Thanks for generous claps and being a Medium supporter!! Thanks for following and subscribing!

—

This post was previously published on medium.com.

***

From The Good Men Project on Medium

What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean?

My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me

The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex

The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence

***

Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.

All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.

A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.