Why I Don’t Do the Gym and No It’s Not the Stairmaster

I’ve been a member of two gyms in my life. Both were co-ed. Both places prided themselves on being ‘judgement’ free and secure places to work out at,

Sadly, however, I felt appraised like I was a piece of meat to be stared at by the dude doing bench presses in the back corner. With that said, the favour was returned. I will admit I was checking the guys out, too.

Although my interest didn’t seem as rude, as primal as how men view women.

At the first gym, there were two older men, in their fifties or sixties, at two different times, who seemed to be smitten with me. One of them wasn’t too bad, he was friendly and we chatted about the weather or other trivial things.

Although soon enough, it got annoying, it made me feel off, how he was always hovering around. I tried to avoid him, tried to alter my schedule by a little while, just to make sure I left before he came or he was on his way out.

It was pathetic. But at the time, I didn’t mind changing my behavior, when it should have been him. Now I know better.

However, I soon went to the front desk and told the woman behind the counter what the problem was and she took my concern lightly. He’s friendly with everyone, she said, but she’d let him know about his actions and make sure he stopped. He did, thankfully.

A few years later, I moved to another location, for a whole other reason, and joined a gym there. This time, it didn’t take long for another older man to come up to me and ask my name. He wasn’t a staff member, he was a fellow patron of the gym.

He had no business doing it and anyways we didn’t know each other, I wasn;t about to give a random dude my name. I didn’t answer, but ignored him and he got a little rude.

Not to mention, the gym had odd hours of operation. On weekends, the desk was empty and you got in with a key fob. The place was on camera, but still a few times I would go in and it was dead. Luckily the times I did go, nothing happened, there were no accidents and no other incidents of harassment. Although it was not enjoyable and it was the main reason I stopped going.

Some could say, it goes with the territory and women wear those tight leggings and low cut tanks to get attention, don’t they?

No, it doesn’t mean anything and there are a whole host of other reasons they wear ‘revealing’ clothes at the gym.

They wear them to feel comfortable.

They wear them to move better/faster.

They wear them because they’re made of sweat wicking material.

Besides, a pantsuit would look ridiculous  while someone did squats or burpees.

Still, some women ditch their lycra outfits for the rattiest t-shirts and sweats, in an attempt to remain invisible from prying eyes. It’s a pity they have to change their appearance or risk excessive attention.

Women already face unwanted attention when they go to work, go out to the store for groceries, go get coffee and when they get drinks at the bar. The gym is just one other place where women will encounter unwanted attention from men.

This is why many women enjoy memberships at all women fitness clubs or gyms, but these are few and far between. They often have daycare rooms , spa rooms, and little coffee/tea lounges to chat, too.

However, often they’re located in big cities, which narrows down the availability to women in other areas and not all women can afford the price either.

These all women fitness places are like salons, sacred spaces where women of all ages and fitness levels can congregate and blow off steam that they’ve accumulated from work, family, and life.

Some rec centres and gyms have specific days for specific genders, which I think is a step in the right direction.

You can have one day where you can exercise and enjoy yourself, not worrying about someone staring too much at your ass or chest for that half hour or hour you do reps or swim laps.

I know for a fact that the next gym I go to will be for women.

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