Being a sexually driven woman, who advocates for men who are feeling lost, stuck, or alone in their relationships, requires a courageous vulnerability.
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I write to share stories, to tell my story and to tell the story of many men, even though I am a woman.
I write to lift taboo’s, to open minds, and to open men’s hearts to the possibilities that lay within.
I write to spark debate, to stimulate deeper thought and to create conversations that matter.
Though I am not a writer, I am a storyteller.
In my ‘Conversations With Adam’ I share the stories of many men who are feeling lost, stuck or alone in their relationships. I write the stories of their fears and frustrations in life, to lift the glass ceiling and create a sense of normalcy for all those in silent struggle. For those who feel like they are all alone and no longer know what to ‘be’ in the world.
I encourage men to ‘be’ whatever it is that they want to be. To recognize the importance of their masculinity, to redefine what it means to be a man that lives a life true to his biological makeup.
I am continually inspired by the courage men show in sharing their stories about their relationships, anger and darker times.
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I believe that over time, we have devolved man, rather than evolved him. I believe that the lines of relationships have become so blurred that men are showing up disempowered, unsure of their place, their role, and with no connection to what they actually need to feel fulfilled, masculine and driven.
I believe in every man’s right to express himself sexually in his relationship. I believe that the taboo’s of sexual fantasies and desires need to be removed and more openly talked about between couples. I believe that women need to start turning up as women again, so that men can be men.
I am continually inspired by the courage men show in sharing their stories about their relationships, anger and darker times. That they speak openly and from the heart, and are free to express themselves in their most vulnerable moments is something that I honor and respect.
As a woman sharing these stories, I must also show up courageously vulnerable. Exposing myself as a sexually driven woman, who believes in the empowerment and dominance of men in the relationship, defying much current sentiment from the female voice. I do so willingly.
Photo: Flickr/The Pug Father
I applaud your objective. I just think it’s so essential that women take part in advocating for men’s well being, especially in the wake of angrier feminist sentiment that sometimes has been the loudest faction of women’s advocates. Just as many men support women in their attempts to fulfill the part of their humanity that is traditionally male (her need for success and recognition for her strength and intelligence), women should support men in their attempts to grasp more emotional fulfillment from life. In the end, we’re in this together. What we should respect in each other most is our… Read more »
Thank you Paul. Wonderful to hear from you.
You’ll enjoy my next blog coming out this week, (and many more to come for GMP) so stay tuned and thanks for connecting.
Paul, I agree that women should advocate for men’s well being. And yes, there are men that support women and women that support men. But I would bet that more of us don’t feel supported by the other gender then those who feel supported. I just read an article where some men of GMP took special cause AGAINST the idea of helping and supporting women through standing by their side. Instead, the men wanted to talk about how men are treated instead and went as far as to say that helping women was the same as treating them like children… Read more »
The following 4 word phrase should never be spoke by a woman to a man,”We need to talk”. He tunes out immediately.
The following 4 word phrase should never be thought by a woman or spoken to her friends, her mother, her family, etc: “Why can’t he just…?”. He is who he is stop hoping he’ll magically change when you have no idea how to make him want to.
Yes, well said Dbeee. I agree entirely.
He doesn’t need to ‘be’ anything more than he already is. x
I am a strong supporter of addressing men’s rights and men’s issues as much as women’s. I believe every bit in the empowerment of men to be their true selves without fear of judgement, censorship or worse. Forgiveness if I am misunderstanding you because I agree on all points apart from where you talk about the dominance of men in the relationship. What do you mean by dominance? I’m asking because for me personally to dominate is to exert control over something or someone. Do you mean dominance as in self-control? Ownership of a role? Other than that I fully… Read more »
Thank you for your lovely comments. In relation to dominance, It’s consensual (perhaps I should have made that clearer). But the point is, that women need to show up as women and men show up as men. Dominance sexually (in this context) is that men have the right to sex in a marriage. Many women use sex as a weapon to keep their husband on a string. I believe that sex is as much a part of the marriage as taking care of the kids and helping with the house, or providing the income.
” women need to show up as women and men show up as men. Dominance sexually (in this context) is that men have the right to sex in a marriage.” No, there is nothing that should make another person feel entitled to use my body for sexual gratification. The flaw in this supposition-that men gain a right to sex through the act of marriage alone lifts the responsibility of staying intimately connected (both physically and emotionally) to his partner. It condones stigmatizing the completely natural ebb and flow of desire all couples experience in long term relationships, but apparently only… Read more »
No, not at all. Ebbs and flows are are all normal, as are role reversal here, with men with lower sex drive than a partner, however it’s not as frequent. In that event, the reverse is definitely true. But we all have a right to sexual interaction. How each partner does that (marriage or not) is up to them.
Please bare in mind – this is why I write for men. It’s not meant to please everyone and I accept that it won’t.
Dominance can mean many things in a marriage. It’s not in the scope of this blog to explain all of that, it’s purely why I write for men. I hear their stories that they share with me. This is my account of why I continue to do the work that I do and how that has evolved over time, from the stories of many men.
I believe we have some philosophical differences, and I think I am reacting to the phrasing of your definition of ‘dominance’ as well.
I would say that in a relationship both people have the right to ask for their desires to be fulfilled by the other person in a place of safety, compassion and respect. I believe that is a key component of true sexual intimacy; being able to ask for what you need from your partner without fear of judgment or shaming.
Great Post Jasmin!
Thank you Dax 🙂