Steven Lake has never gotten so much attention, and women keep telling him he’s sexy. Is it because of his beard?
Beards! Yup. Beards have a profound effect on women. This realization is not based on scientific research but on my own personal experience. Until a month ago, I have never had a beard. Oh, I had a goatee when I was an actor in the seventies, but I was in a steady relationship and did not notice any effect in the world.
So here I am in my mid-fifties and growing a beard. Why, you ask? As motivation. Yes, motivation to finish my book. I get to cut off the beard when I finish. Growing a beard is aversive. It itches like crazy and looks . . . well it looks unkempt. The sooner the book is completed the sooner I get to shave.
But, and this is a big but, women love it. I kid you not. Since growing this thing I have had numerous offers for joyous encounters and, without exception, every woman compliments me. “You look sooo good, it really suits you, and you look sexy.” Sexy??? What are they talking about? This is scary stuff. If this gets out I will end up with a reputation – and I may have to live up to it.
It gets worse. Even my wife loves it. I stared at her in disbelief. “You like it?” I exclaimed.
“Yes, it’s sexy.” Oh no, there’s that word again.
“Why?” I asked, scanning the room for a quick exit.
“It makes you look rough and ready,” she said with a lascivious smile crossing her face. Ready for what I’m thinking. I didn’t dare ask lest I have to prove myself right then and there.
Apparently, this rough and ready look is enticing to the opposite sex. This got me to pondering on the factors of attraction in the male female dance of life. I have never had this kind of reaction from my wife or any other women. This has been a shocking experience even if good for the ego. So what is it about the rough and ready look that titillates some women, young and middle-aged alike?
When I asked this question to my women friends they got this twinkle in their eyes, a little smile on their lips and a knowing laugh. Just the thought of a guy with a beard created electricity in the air. Excitement! That’s it. The old stereotype of women liking dangerous men pops into my head. I begin to think about those male models in print advertising and movie stars who all have a three to five day stubble growing. Now that’s got to be rough to kiss. But those advertising execs must know something. And those movie stars certainly have enough women throwing themselves at their feet.
I think I am on to something. Most men are clean-shaven. Wearing a beard is different. It says you don’t follow the crowd. You are strong enough to chart your own course fashion wise and don’t give a hoot about what the boss thinks. In your mind, you are the boss. Women seem to love men who are confident and know themselves. Maybe you are even a little dangerous, unpredictable even.
Who falls into these categories? Let’s see, there are bikers, pirates, revolutionaries, poets, artists, writers and university professors. University professors! Aren’t they typically staid and totally predictable? Well, maybe not. A brilliant mind and a beard could be a very sexy thing. Just ask all those graduate students who end up in bed with their professors (this still happens despite all the rules and social injunctions against it).
For all the guys out there I just wanted to let you know about the power of the beard. Do not take the beard lightly. It could change your life in at least two meaningful ways. One, you won’t have to shave anymore and you will be able to sleep an extra five minutes every morning. Not bad. Two, you will have to deal with women thinking you are a wild man who will sweep them off their feet and invite them away to some exotic local where you will bring forth their unbridled passion to levels never before experienced. If you want that responsibility – more power to you. I just want to finish my book and get back to boring.
Lead Photo: AP/Matt Sayles