The way we define commitment can influence how lasting our commitments will be.
A new study coming out of UCLA found what saying those vows actually means to the average person.
Based on an analysis of 172 married couples over the first 11 years of their marriage, the study’s researchers found couples tend to subscribe to one of two different models for commitment.
Lasting commitment has at least as much to do with a willingness to compromise as appreciation for what naturally works between partners.
|
In the first model, couples liked each other and wanted to continue their relationship. In the second model, couples were willing to do whatever it took to maintain the relationship.
Framing these two different models of commitment, researchers noted couples that followed the second “do anything to make it work” model were less likely to divorce.
The study confirmed lasting commitment has at least as much to do with a willingness to compromise as appreciation for what naturally works between you and your partner, a reality some couples fail to understand.
“The people who ended their marriages would have said they were very committed to the marriage,” said senior study author Thomas Bradbury. “But they did not have the resolve to say, ‘Honey, we need to work on this; it’s going to be hard, but it’s important.’”
—
This article originally appeared on DatingAdvice.com .
Photo by Shannonkringen.
“….researchers noted couples that followed the second “do anything to make it work” model were less likely to divorce.”
I would have been shocked if it had turned out any other way!
Shocked as in stumbling across a herd of unicorns in my backyard.