It may be an impossible dream, but David Lesser hopes that someday DILFs don’t exist.
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MILFs don’t exist. Not really. There is an entire section of the internet dedicated to these Mothers I’d Like to F*ck (or at least a popular sub-section of a very popular part of the internet), but little evidence of the key characteristic of MILFdom…namely, motherhood. You will almost never see a picture of a MILF caring for her child. In most cases, thankfully. But this omission is not just for, err, pragmatic reasons; the crux of the MILF’s hotness is that it’s hard to believe she is someone’s mother. DILFs, or Dads I’d Like to F*ck, are a newer phenomenon and vastly different. They’re sexy because of how affectionate they are with their children. They’re desirable because they’re parents, not in spite of it.
Apparently very desirable. The Instagram account @DILFs_of_Disneyland
Maybe the difference is about expectations. We expect women to be good moms. That’s what we’re taught women are biologically built for. Not only does the baby literally sprout from your loins, but you ladies then carry his food supply on your chest! It is a truism that “ordinary” is not sexy. Women are supposed to be the care-givers, the nurturers. It is what we expect. It’s so commonplace that we don’t even think about it. When a man sees a woman at the playground putting a bandaid on her daughter’s knee and comforting her, he doesn’t give the scene a second glance. Unless that woman is really hot and bending over, showing a bit of cleavage. Then…MILF ALERT!!! But it has nothing to do with her maternal instinct or the tenderness she is showing. She is just a totally bangable chick. With a kid? That’s crazy. She looks way too young to be a mom!
This is in stark contrast to the DILFs of Disneyland or anywhere else. Yes, they’re good looking dudes. But that is not why they’re DILFs. It’s because they are being extraordinary. Sad as it is to say, the bar is not set particularly high for fathers. This is changing, but sometimes it feels like an uphill battle. We start out at a disadvantage. If men were the ones giving birth or had a highly functional baby-sustaining body body part, it would be a different story. Hell, it wouldn’t even have to be baby-sustaining. Just something! If the primary purpose of a man’s back hair was to diaper his newborn, I don’t think we’d be too surprised to see him a couple years later walking hand-in-hand with his daughter or giving his son a kiss. It would clearly be what he was genetically designed to do. Unfortunately, back hair is useless (and in no way helps DILF status). Another problem is society’s acceptance of the (mostly out-dated) idea of the idiot dad who is afraid to show any affection and is there merely provide financial support for his family. Thus, seeing a man share a tender moment with his children is still, unfortunately, extraordinary and, therefore, sexy.
It may be an impossible dream, but I hope that someday in the near future DILFs, like MILFs, no longer exist. It would be amazing if DILF pics were just hot guys of a certain age. The DILFs of Disneyland will need to crop those pesky kids out the pictures to make the men more appealing. We will know dads are truly co-equal parents when guys can be objectified just for their looks. It won’t matter if we’re pushing our kids in the swing, expertly braiding their hair, deftly changing a diaper or bending down for an adorably exaggerated kiss. Once you expect us to be care-givers and nurturers, none of these acts will impress you. They’ll be commonplace. Until you notice that the dad bending down to give his son a kiss has a really nice butt and is totally bangable. DILF ALERT!!!! No way that dude has a kid!
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Originally appeared at AmateurIdiotProfessionalDad
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Being a milf hottie so called by my friends brothers, i got used to it and actually enjoy the beauty it comes with it.
This is really true.. haha
I never spotted these differences at that point so thanks for sharing such nice ideas.
I don’t know that my opinion is representative of any significant portion of the female population that is sexually interested in men, but from my own perspective it isn’t so much that a good-looking man is being tender with children that gets me, so much as it’s that he’s being tender with *anybody*. Over that last 15 years I’ve had three serious partners, and of those partners, two were verbally/emotionally/sexually abusive, and one was neglectful. For me it isn’t about the status of a father nurturing his children that I find attractive, though as I get older I do find… Read more »
I don’t think we are moving to “equality”. It just sounds like we are moving to more objectification for everyone all around. More voyeurism. More invasion of privacy. We aren’t even asking the same questions we would have asked 10 years ago in regards to our privacy. Did these men on DILFS of Disneyland even consent to have their pictures posted? Do they even want to be posted here? I personally really hate that other people (strangers) can take a picture of you and post it. Am I the only one that feels that way? And I say that as… Read more »
Just as a side note, I would acutually find it really awesome of men spent as much time celebrating real mothers and motherhood – even creating instagram accounts or blogs for them – then they did looking for porn-stars that are simply lableled “MILFS” because they are over the age of 25.
Hey Erin – great point about the privacy issue. I’m not sure about the DILFs of Disneyland policy, though I suspect consent is obtained. In this case, the sexy dad in question has his own (very popular) blog and was contact and gave consent prior to this article being published. As far as objectifying men purely for their looks being a sign of equality, that was mostly a joke. I just meant that it would be great if the tender acts of fatherhood that now make a dad a DILF were so commonplace we wouldn’t even notice them. I was… Read more »
Thanks for your response Dave. I am not familiar with how instagram works as I don’t go on it. I do hope that the men are aware they are posted online and that they agree to it. But I don’t really see how consent could be obtained if you are taking pictures of strangers. Some of the shots look pretty candid. Unless it’s these men’s wives and gf’s who are posting it and asked before hand. I can understand why you don’t want Dad’s to be ear-marked as doing something special for just being good Dads. I really do get… Read more »
Not to water down the excellent point being made in this essay, but for the record, the existence of, let alone the presence of a child is not technically a requirement to be a DILF.
Okay maybe I’m just an odd person when I think about MILFs but its more of an age thing. An older woman that is attractive. A lot of the MILF porn you come across will be of the “My Best Friend’s Mom”stuff. Also I think the appropriateness of sex and children.
If a guy saw a woman with a child and had a sexual thought (heaven forbid he make an actual comment) it could be taken as inappropriate.
Here is a possible explanation. An advice columnist had asked women to describe the perfect penis. He got back comments like the perfect penis is one attached to a man who respects and loves me, etc. Alyssa Royse had made the comment in another post that she wasn’t surprised with the reaction because sex is better with an attentive partner who is concerned with your enjoyment. Many of these women might believe that because he has a child and is attentive to the child’s needs and desires, he would also be attentive to her needs and desires in bed.
Dedicated Involved Loving Fathers = DILF; I have the t-shirt.
Ha! AlexD, I like that. But does MILF still stand for Mother I’d Like to F*ck?
I love it: http://www.amazon.com/Dedicated-Involved-Loving-T-Shirt-CafePress/dp/B00D2ESJWW
“We will know dads are truly co-equal parents when guys can be objectified just for their looks ”
Magic Mike XXL?
John – those guys aren’t just beefcakes, they’re equality in g-strings. We’re making progress!