Is Twitter the New Relationship Killer?

It’s no secret that the more technology evolves, the more chaos we bring into our own personal dating lives. Knowing this fact early on, I have avoided the hurdles of texting and contacting any attractive acquaintance on Facebook. I even avoided adding the Facebook Timeline and I’m telling you, if you added it, you’re just asking for trouble. (Click HERE to find out why.)

So for the last little while, I have been on cloud nine and proud of the fact that I have no dirt on me whatsoever when it comes to social media networks. You can even say I have been smug about it when listening to my boys complain to me that their girlfriends are pissed at them for accepting a friend request from an old friend. (Rookies.)

However, I didn’t account for TWITTER.

Recently, I came home and my girlfriend was not a happy camper. Apparently I was in the doghouse for tweeting too many women on my Twitter account.

For real?

Thinking this was just her insecurities, I blew it off until I recently received some emails from some fellow twiends about how their significant others are slightly perturbed over our friendly “twirting” sessions.

Give me a f*cking break.

I’m sorry, but anybody in any relationship who brings up Twitter (and doesn’t have a Twitter account, mind you) as a means of betrayal in the relationship has some insecurities to definitely sort out.

True intimacy and trust should not be broken over a two-sentence update. No relationship should be in jeopardy because you added a winking face emoticon at the end of your meaningless tweet either. Also, your loyalty shouldn’t be questioned based on your follower list!

I find Twitter to be cyber-stalker friendly because unlike Facebook, you don’t need to add somebody to read their tweets. (Unless you lock up your account and if you’re in a relationship, that just makes you look like you actually do have something to hide.) You don’t even need to have Twitter to look up on somebody’s updates either.

I’m sorry, but unless your lover tweets something like “Hey sexy! FML!  my GF is nagging me 4 realz. Wanna hang out l8r? #donewithrelationships,” then you have no grounds for accusing your lover of betraying you. In fact, they should question why you’re looking for “twirt” on them in the first place.

If you’re a tweeting friend, then you know what you’re doing. You know you’re putting out things for the whole world to see and if you tweeted something that could possibly get you in trouble with your significant other, then you’re dumb as “twuck.”

The reason why I enjoy Twitter so much is because since over 60 percent of the North American population is on the social network, it gives me the chance to converse with amazing people I would have never met otherwise and the fact that I write about dating and relationships, I’m already expected to have more female readers than male readers and I won’t censor myself just so significant other can feel at ease.

And do you want to know why?

It’s because although Twitter is great, it’s not a substitute for real-life experiences and the creation of meaningful real-life relationships. I dig my Twiends, (they get me through my workday) but at the end of the day, I want to go home and spend hours saying things I couldn’t possibly fit into a hundred tweets to the woman I love and have been thinking about all day.

Sometimes, a tweet is just a tweet and if you can’t even accept that, then maybe you need to tweet your relationship good-bye. (Okay, I will stop with the Twitter analogies.)

So what do you guys think? Do you have any bad experiences with Twitter in regards to your relationships? If you dig this article, Retweet it to your followers with the hashtag, #Stopstalkingmytweets.

Originally appeared at Personal Facts.

—Photo shawncampbell/Flickr

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About Jimmy Jacob

Jimmy Jacob is the head writer over at Personal Facts (http://personalsfacts.com), a blog about online dating, sex, love and personal ancedotes of Jimmy's dating woes and successes. You can also connect with him on twitter @personalsfacts (http://twitter.com/personalsfacts.com).

Comments

  1. Andrew Martens says:

    If one person in a relationship is having issues with their partner tweeting with ‘too many women’, it’s fairly obvious that there are issues of insecurity and jealousy.

    The issue to deal with is, “What is the cause of these feelings, and how can we work to address that?” Innocuous tweets should not be threatening a healthy relationship – but why not work with your partner to help them to overcome their insecurities? Perhaps there was betrayal in the past with a previous partner via some form of online communications, or they simply don’t understand the nature of twitter, or there is some other concern. Getting to the root of it will help them as an individual, as well as helping the relationship.

    If they’re concerned about Twitter, of all things, then it’s only a matter of time until they object to a person socializing with friends of the opposite sex.

  2. Travis Blankenship says:

    Twitter as a relationship killer is brilliant. It’s the chance to make all new “deal breakers” without the creepy guilt of stalking. Since it’s easier to follow someone you’ve seen once than it is to friend them, you can easily avoid second contact after noticing he/she retweets everything from Ricky Martin since that episode of Glee. Connections based on media obsession rather than self-interest are sooo much healthier, anyway.

  3. I’ve already expressed to you why i think you’re being short-sighted. As one of the women that you sometimes Tweet, and because I follow you on Twitter, I can absolutely see why your girlfriend is perturbed.

    Your blog has a mostly female audience. You have a lot of women in your orbit, and that would make any woman – even the most secure ones – suspicious. Frankly, it should. Any man or woman with an inordinate number of opposite sex friends or “friends” is questionable to me.

    You have to remember that you very freely discuss aspects of your relationship on your blog and, if we’re going to be honest, you sometimes paint your girlfriend in a negative light. And then a bunch of women come in and judge her. You are greatly underestimating what kind of an impact that has on a woman. You are sharing intimate details of your relationship with other females.. That is very, very threatening to many woman. I don’t care how confident she is. It’s a threat, and you’d be smart to get a better understanding of female to female dynamics if you’re going to insist upon cultivating a following of women while trying to maintain a relationship.

    I don’t know any man, other than one with a propensity for drama and self-obsession, who would want to be subjected to that kind of scrutiny or who would wish to be made so vulnerable. .

  4. Blaming Twitter as yet another cause for break-ups was inevitable. For this exact reason, my colleagues are about to launch a website called http://www.Cuplinx.com
    After all the talk about how social media sites (Facebook, and now Twitter, etc) are causing the demise of relationships, it’s about time a site was created to do just the opposite! The goal of Cuplinx is to strengthen the bond, communication and intimacy between existing couples. And it’s FUN. Between the
    Romance Recipes, the advice and tips section, and the area where a sig others can post a debate they’re having and have the community vote and comment, couples are sure to thrive, bond and add passion to their relationship!

  5. That Guy says:

    I wish I could explain all the ways you’re wrong, but I only get 140 characters….

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  1. […] I first read Jimmy’s post questioning whether Twitter had become the new relationship killer I said aloud, “Yes.” After some thought I realized that that’s not totally […]

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