Tonia Krauser is my friend and colleague and I’m her ride ho (she drives me to work most mornings) and Oliver is her dog. Tonia is a marketing whiz who holds it all together at Second Harvest, and a real party animal. Oliver likes to whiz, and is also a real party animal.
Tonia’s grandmother still lives by herself in her own apartment completely independently and, is probably in better shape than she is. Oliver is a working dog. By ‘working’, he means going into the office of Second Harvest once every 2 weeks or so with his owner. I’m making an exception to my normal rule of only having ten things, because I refuse to devote an entire post to a dog.
Tonia’s List (her 90 year-old Irish grandmother):
- A shandy a day keeps the doctor away.
- You can never stuff too much Kleenex in too many places.
- If you are capable, it’s your duty to volunteer and help those less fortunate.
- Keeping up with celebrity gossip is a valid hobby.
- If you say ‘fackn’ it’s not really swearing.
- If you pretend you don’t notice it, someone will eventually pick up the aforementioned Kleenex when it falls on the floor.
- Potatoes contain all the vitamins you need (push any green vegetables to the side of your plate).
- A mother can never move past the loss of a child.
- Never stand in the way of a senior citizen and a slot machine. You will get hurt.
- Irish women rock!
Oliver’s List (being a working dog):
- It all starts with Starbucks.
- Management meetings sound more exciting than they really are.
- It’s easy to be popular when you let coworkers rub your belly.
- Monday mornings are hard.
- Second Harvest throws the best Halloween party I have ever been to – leftover toilet paper from the mummy-wrapping contest to roll around in, crumbs to eat off the floor and I finally got to wear that hot dog costume I’ve had sitting in the closet.
- It’s totally appropriate to fall asleep in a meeting (as long as you’re a dog).
- The drivers are the best colleagues because they smell really, really good.
- Business cards take forever to arrive.
- Much to my dismay casual Fridays doesn’t mean wearing a tie and nothing else.
- Wagging your tail gets you promoted.