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I was going to start this off by listing the definition of the word “nerd.” Then I thought, this piece may have a nerd-heavy readership and realized that nerds don’t need to look up the word “nerd”, in a dictionary
We know who we are and we have better things to do than look up words that are only four letters long.
That being said, dictionary definitions of the word include terms such as “unattractive,” “unstylish,” and “socially inept.” While I can’t get behind unattractive, I can agree that unstylish and socially inept does speak to some of us. A little.
No. A nerd is that person who really gets into something in a big way. Something the rest of society doesn’t necessarily get behind, but neither do they have a problem with it, such as comic books, computers, video games, geocaching or Dungeons & Dragons.
And yes, many of us have social challenges, although, “inept,” is probably taking it a bit too far. Many of us are comfortable amongst our own and stick to hanging out with fellow nerds so as to feel accepted.
We’re the quirky individuals who wear what we want to wear and hang out where we want to hang out and while we’re not necessarily OK with some of the looks we get from people, most of us are used to them, so it’s not that big a deal.
Some look at nerds as boys and not as men, but that’s not fair. Just because someone likes things of a nerdy nature, how does that make them not a man?
In fact, I was straight up told that I shouldn’t encourage people to enjoy their nerdy pastimes and that being a nerd was a bad thing. [cue up buzzer sound]
That’s a stereotype and I’m here to break that stereotype and tell you that nerds can be men. Strong men, capable of doing great things in the world. We already do. And for the record, not just men, but women too.
I’m far from a stereotype. I’m a fifty-three-year-old man with Asperger’s Syndrome who has had a stroke, has a service dog and am the very proud owner of an award-winning purple goatee. I also wear Buddy Holly style glasses and can almost always be found in my black felt porkpie hat
I also like comic books, not because I’m a kid but because, as a writer, I’m amazed at the level of writing in the majority of comic books today. I consume them in part because I love the stories that are being told and partially because of the way in which they’re being written.
I actually pick up writing tips and ideas while reading some comic books, which is why I usually keep a journal at hand when I’m reading, so I can make notes.
Does any of that make me less of a man?
Look at pretty much any piece of technology that’s lying around your home, car or office and thank the nerd, stereotypical or not, who designed it for you.
After all the above nonsense, what exactly is so amazing about being a nerd? I’m glad you asked.
Below are seven amazing things about being a nerd and if you have any extra reasons I missed, please let me know in the comments.
1. You can hang out at the comic book shop and no one cares
For my type of nerdy, it’s the comic book shop, for nerds of a different type it could be any numerous types of places including game shops, bookstores, computer shops, video game stores or anywhere else people of a nerdy attitude may decide to congregate.
It’s important to note that when I say, “no one cares,” I’m speaking of the general population and not necessarily the nerd’s spouse, significant other, boss, roommate or anyone else important in their life. They care how much we hang out at certain places. They care a lot.
2. Friday Nerd Game Night at the above mentioned comic book shop
Again, this has to do with my type of nerdy and you can apply this principle to whatever floats your nerd boat.
Nerd game night at the comic book shop is where my people gather on picnic tables located in the back of the shop to participate in a Magic the Gathering tournament, play Dungeons & Dragons or Pathfinder or whatever else you want to play.
And to answer the obvious question, yes, girls do come to both Nerd Game Night and to the comic book shop and no, they’re not all with a guy and just there because he is.
Not only are some women into comic books, but you would also probably be amazed to find out that some of the best comic book writers and illustrators are female. It’s actually pretty cool that my type of nerdiness is not as much of a guy only thing as it used to be.
I for one appreciate the influx of estrogen into our ranks.
3. We’re becoming more attractive, A.K.A. people are starting to dig us
It seems that we’re starting to be noticed by others more than we were and that’s a good thing. Maybe shows like The Big Bang Theory makes us look more attractive to those we want to attract, whether it be Cis or LBGTQ.
Nerdy is slowly becoming cool and I for one am very happy to see that we’re finally being accepted, respected and celebrated for who we are and what we’re into. For those of us who enjoy our hobbies, knowing that there are people interested in us romantically is a nice feeling.
4. Many of us have very large…IQ’s
Education and nerdiness have always gone hand in hand. A high IQ has nothing to do with a person’s grades, what degree they hold or anything else academic. Still, the fact remains that a significant section of the nerd population either has or is believed to have a high IQ.
Do we? Some of us do. As for the rest? I honestly have no clue, nor do I care what a person’s IQ is.
The ones that don’t have a large IQ can ride the coattails of those that do or can be part of the myth that we all do. No one should ever lie about their IQ, but if people want to believe that we’re all really freaking intelligent, then who am I to stop people from believing?
5. Argyle, Converse & superhero t-shirts
I’m a big lover of argyle and have been since the early 1980s (ask anyone I went to high school with). When it’s cool out I throw on one of my argyle cardigans and I’ve even been known to wear a pair of pushed down argyle socks during the summer with shorts and one of my nine pairs of Converse in assorted colors.
I only have a couple of superhero t-shirts but I wear them with pride. Even the pink Gwenpool one. Seriously.
I’m pretty sure that my clothing style isn’t yours, but the beautiful thing about being a nerd, and kind of my idea behind this point is that we can do our thing nd let the haters hate.
6. No one expects you to adhere to social norms
This is NOT a license to go out and be an ass, but if some of us want to camp out for a couple of days before a new movie, who cares? I won’t be joining them, but it’s not bothering me a bit.
So what if we go to events that end in the word “Con” and that some of us can identify every single thing either Steve Jobs or Bill Gates ever created? Also, who cares that we may have interests that don’t interest you? We’re interested and that’s really what matters.
There are some that speak only nerd and others that don’t understand a word if it, then there are those who, like me, can transcend the gap between us. I speak fluent comic book nerd, but also coached ice hockey up to the high school level and played college soccer, thus I can communicate on some level with the rest of the world.
Like Aquaman, Some of us have the ability to live in two different worlds.
7. That Comic Book Nerd at Good Men Project
Yes, that’s right, they let me write a column about things I enjoy. I get to spend time nerding out as I prepare and write it and even though it does take a long time to research titles and put everything together, it’s a ton of fun and that’s the best part of it! If you’re into comic books, please check it out HERE.
So what’s your take on all this? Are we kids in adult bodies or are we adults enjoying life? Are you a nerd? If so, what’s your nerd vice? We want to know.
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However, you engage with The Good Men Project—you can help lead this conversation about the changing roles of men in the 21st century. Join us!
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Photo credit: Photo courtesy Unsplash
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