5 Things Men Don’t Care About (But You Think They Do)

 

Women obsess over their flaws.

You’ll find so many things that make a woman insecure: her weight, hair, makeup, clothes, and how much she drinks. When you’re in love, it gets even worse. You want to impress your crush, and your flaws could scare him away.

There’s nothing wrong with looking your best for your crush.

But what if I told you men don’t care about these things?

Men and women think differently. We have different priorities, values, interests, and expectations for a relationship. So, if you want to impress a man, why would you assume he thinks like you?

You spend time, money, and energy obsessing over things that don’t matter.

This stops now. When you want to impress a man, you have to focus on the right things. You’re a queen, but you have limited resources (and you want to use them wisely).

Here are a few things men don’t care about (but you think they do):

1. Makeup.

The saying, “women get ready for other women, not men,” is true. Women spend time, money, and energy on their makeup routine. And yes, it makes them look beautiful.

But men are completely oblivious when it comes to makeup.

Sure, they can tell you’re wearing makeup. But they don’t know the difference between blush and contour. Your makeup routine is nothing but a lot of details that come together. And men can’t recognize these details.

You shouldn’t stop wearing makeup.

Men may not notice makeup, but they notice your confidence. So if it gives you a confidence boost, go for it. You should always do what makes you feel good.

Yes, you should wear makeup. But don’t expect men to compliment your makeup.

2. Beauty trends.

Whoever told you “looks don’t matter” lied. You have to be attracted to your partner (otherwise, you should remain friends). So yes, men care about your looks.

But they don’t give a sh*t about the latest beauty trend.

Men care about your overall look, the combination of your hair, face, body, and style. Beauty is when these things are in harmony. But specific trends don’t matter. I’ve never met a man who said, “she’s not wearing the right clothes; I’m not attracted to her anymore.”

This applies to every trend: clothes, makeup, and even weight.

That doesn’t mean you should ignore all trends. But don’t obsess over them. Find the trends that highlight your beauty, but don’t follow them blindly.

Beauty is the overall combination of your features, not a specific trend. So create your style.

3. Luxury bags.

Women can tell the difference between a Shein and a Chanel bag. Men can’t.

You have multiple reasons to buy a luxury bag: to feel more confident, because it fits your style, or simply because you want to. But impressing a man isn’t one of these reasons.

A man might appreciate your sense of style, but he’ll never fall in love with you because you own a Chanel bag. Most men can’t even name ten luxury bag brands.

Men care about one thing: if you can fit your belongings in your bag. Otherwise, he’ll have to carry them for you.

Luxury bags may look nice, but they’re crazy expensive. So make sure you buy it for the right reasons.

4. Stretch marks.

Find a woman without stretch marks, and I’ll give you one million dollars. Even better: find a woman who has never felt insecure about her stretch marks (okay, I don’t have that much money, but you get the point).

You know every woman has stretch marks, but it doesn’t matter: it still makes you insecure.
Except men don’t care about stretch marks.

I’ve never met a man who said, “she had stretch marks, so I’m not attracted anymore.” Beauty is your overall look. Stretch marks are a minor detail in the overall picture.

Men may notice your stretch marks, but a great man will never judge you (or lose feelings for you).

5. Your underwear.

When you’re intimate with a man, you want everything to be perfect. So you think the wrong underwear can kill your confidence (and your mood).

You’re wrong.

Imagine this: you met a nice guy, and you’re getting serious. You feel ready for the next step, but you’re spontaneous, and you’re afraid he’ll judge your underwear.

Except, at this point, you’re already intimate.

If you’re already going out for a while, he won’t care about your underwear. He cares about you. Your connection is stronger than your clothes (if it’s not, it’s a clear sign to leave him).

What man would stop sex because he doesn’t like your underwear? Nobody.

The right underwear makes you confident, and that’s great. But it’s about you, not him. Men care about having a great time with you, not what you wear. They would never let a minor detail ruin your night.

There is, however, one thing men do care about:

Personality.

What do you expect from your relationship? A good-looking man? A man who wears luxury brands? A man who follows fashion trends?

No. You want a person who is a good match for you.

Yes, looks matter. But the things that make you insecure (clothes, stretch marks, or makeup) don’t matter when you look for a great partner.

Men who want a serious relationship know that these minor details don’t matter. They’ll look for a woman with the same goals, interests, and nice personality.

When you put things into perspective, everything changes.

The minor details that make you insecure don’t matter when you think of finding a life partner. Finding a good match for you is more important than looking perfect.

You will spend most of your life with your partner. Find someone who is a good company.

…

When you go on a date with your crush, your flaws seem more important than your qualities. You want to impress them, so you hunt these imperfections and eliminate them as soon as possible. There’s nothing wrong with looking the best for your crush.

But he doesn’t care about your insecurities.

Your insecurities come from inside of you. You judge yourself with a woman’s mindset. You’re more detail-oriented, so you look for tiny details to fix. There’s nothing wrong with thinking like a woman.

But you can’t project your mindset on others.

Men prioritize other things. They don’t obsess with details like you do. Instead, they judge beauty for the overall combination. Don’t waste energy on what doesn’t matter. Do what works for you and have a good time.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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