Alex Yarde beleives Zombie films can be helpful primers on how to survive the Zombie Apocalypse.
I’m a proud video gaming, TV watching, comic book reading, geek dad—and unfortunately I have the physique to prove it. After watching World War Z, I’ve come to the stark realization that, I wouldn’t last into the opening credits with the Usain Bolt level sprinters Brad Pitt had to dodge for 129 minutes.
Z-Day is a concept that has been around a long time. In the Book of Revelations, the dead rising from the grave was a sign of the End Of Days. In pop culture, Zombies have served as allegories for everything from conspicuous consumerism run amok to xenophobic fears of illegal immigration. An unknown pathogen, easily transmitted by a bite or scratch, infects, kills, then reanimates the dead, who in turn, infect others. The CDC had to publish a report that zombies were in fact fictional and there is no Z-Day Disaster plan (exactly what the government wants us to believe).
Whether in fast-moving swarms or slow and in great numbers, one factor remains clear, in an outbreak if you aren’t in good shape, you’re Zombie chow.
There are other considerations in trying to make it at the end of the world. I’m interested in starting an ongoing open forum on all things Zeek and I hope to compile more reader input as more Zombiephiles share recourses. Below is a list of important considerations, besides getting in shape.
Information: The Quick & the Dead
Mistakenly or by design, MSM will get it wrong. Outlets will misinform the public which is business as usual for them. Your Twitter feed will be a canary in the coal mine as up to the minute updates (or sudden silence) will alert you. Expect “All Things Geek” to break the story. I’ll play “When The Man Comes Around” on a loop as I head to my undisclosed location. Cash’s rendition begins the brilliant opening montage of Zach Znyder’s 2004 Dawn Of The Dead remake.
strong>Evacuation: “When the going gets tough the tough grab their Go Bag, and get the hell out of dodge.”
The rule of threes is a handy guideline – three weeks without food, three days without water, or three hours without adequate shelter in inclement weather you’re history. It’s smart to have basic equipment and supplies in any emergency.
Check the American Red Cross website, maintain a “Go Bag” and a full tank of gas. As society breaks down, ATMs, which aren’t emptied, won’t work. Cash is king, and not having to fight looters for supplies will be vital.
Avoid National Guard & FEMA. “Safe Zones” on Z-Day are oxymoronic. Being a refugee is a coin flip – stuck in the Super Bowl during Katrina or a Z-Day refuge camp. The movies have taught us one of three things will happen..
1) You will be trapped with infected individuals: No matter what hackneyed “scans” they come up with to sort the healthy, odds are someone in the next tent will reanimate.
2) You will be will slaughtered outright by panicky troops: Things will get ugly quick. When Zeek rears his reanimated head inside the wire, those well-intentioned National Guardsmen, dollars to donuts, will turn on you.
3) You will be experimented on: If you somehow survive a camp purge and the lime pits displaying immunity will get you vivesected.
They need a cure and you don’t add up to a hill of beans compared to saving humanity.
In my opinion, the best bet is to assemble a small group, get to a secure, predetermined hidden location and avoid Army checkpoints.
Location, Location, Location:
Where is your safe heaven? Hospitals are out, full of sick people. Guaranteed first places that fall. Police Stations are also out.
Holding cells full of “disorderly”, proto zombies waiting in the basement to turn? No thanks! If you do have a Zombie Survival Group, it is a good idea to have predetermined hook up points.
Ideally far enough removed from a major city that survivors couldn’t walk easily to it. Predators always follow game. Remember, advertising a safe haven will get you overrun with poor planners. You and your own group will have problems a plenty, so no need to add extras, who don’t have anything to offer.
Defense: Looters, Psychos & Bandits Oh My!
In the end, after a long outbreak, the main threat will most likely be other human survivors. I’m not advocating violence against anyone, but we are talking about the end of the world, so it may come down to that. Protracted gunfights, however, are like ringing a dinner bell.
Master the bow and arrow. A proficient archer is quick, quiet and deadly. In addition, arrows are reusable. If you decide on a firearm I’d go with a carbine with a suppressor. It’s easier to clean and use for inexperienced shooters, gives you more accuracy at a distance than a handgun, plentiful ammunition, quieter and has less muzzle flash then exotic SMGs, rifles or shotguns.
A 38 snub nose revolver in an ankle holster for a last stand. Hatchet, Ice Axe or a Machete. Helpful tools and weapons in one. Tactical gloves and boots. Wrapping magazines & duct tape around your forearms are bite proof in a pinch. Always wash your hands and gear like your mother told you, infection control is important.
Attributes: Time to Level Up!
It’s worth cultivating a useful skill set now before you need it. American Red Cross offers basic first aid. Not a bad idea to learn it anyway and you can donate blood while you’re there. Check your local Emergency Medical Service or Fire Department. They can always use volunteers, help your community plus first responders get heads up on emerging outbreaks.
Any medical, technical, automotive, outdoor survival, hunting, fishing and self-defense knowledge will be useful. The more versatile you are, the more valuable you become to a group or small community the better your chances of being let in. Teach your kids as well. My personal outdoor survival bible is How To Stay Alive In The Woods by Bradford Angier.
This list is by no means definitive, it’s not meant to be. It’s the start of a conversation. With abnormal storms & climatic changes we’ve all been experiencing, prudent disaster preparedness is vital for anyone. If you have further suggestions feel free to comment below or submit articles to [email protected]. All Things Geek RE: Zombie Apocalypse