“Sometimes we see something that is very pure, very fragile, and we realize it’s perfect—even if it isn’t.”
One of my major pitfalls is that I have a deep rooted feelings insufficiency and inadequacy. I act this out by trying to improve myself all the time. I work out hard, eat healthy, meditate, read, and write. I’m trying to overcompensate for the painful gap that I feel, hoping I will be accepted if I just can be a better coach, trainer, friend, boyfriend, lover, or son. I try hard in the hopes that I will see the image I have of myself reflected back at me.
On the other hand, I know that the gap I’m speaking about is non-existent. I’ve experienced the wholeness of things. I know, no I know, I am essentially whole and complete, that there is nothing lacking. The glimpses I had from the Truth were so powerful that I have no choice but to let my trust guide me. It’s this trust that makes me do things that feel very unsafe to my ego, over and over again.
So I’m caught up in this eternal dance of my loving heart and my fearful ego. My hearts want to embrace; my ego wants to compare and judge. And when I embrace my comparing and judging, my ego tells me that I can now safely say that nobody can embrace as well as me, creating distance again between me and the other.
Sometimes it’s helpful to see the truth. Not inside us but right in front of us. Sometimes we see something that is very pure, very fragile, and we realize it’s perfect—even if it isn’t.
Please sacrifice five minutes of your life to watch this video. I hope you feel what I felt.
Originally appeared at Basic Goodness.