16 Ways to Give Constructive Feedback Like a Human

Constructive feedback is a gift few leaders enjoy giving. Done carelessly it quenches enthusiasm—or worse, disrupts productivity and quality work.

Before constructive feedback people struggle. After helpful, thoughtful and good constructive feedback people, feel confident.

Successful feedback sharpens someone’s axe.

16 ways to give constructive feedback:

1. Build trusting relationships. Don’t show up to hammer people and saunter back to your easy chair like you’ve done something spectacular. Do people believe you care about them?
2. Speak to career goals. When you don’t know their goals, the first step is to learn them.
3. Always seek to advantage others. There is no exception to this rule.
4. Use the lens of career goals when explaining negative behaviors. “Interrupting people in meetings doesn’t improve your communication skills.”
5. Encourage more than correct.
6. Build on strengths.
7. Focus on one concern. Old habits are like gum on your shoe. We change slowly.
8. Express issues in one or two sentences. The more you talk the worse it is. “I notice (fill in the blank with specific behaviors.)
9. Give examples. “When you….”
10. Relax. You’re here to help.
11. Speak directly and with kindness.
12. Provide adequate time and privacy.
13. Avoid but. “You’re doing a great job, BUT…” Don’t dilute affirmation with correction.
14. Don’t interpret intentions or motivations. Ask about them. “What are you trying to accomplish when you…?”
15. Collaborate on solutions and develop a path forward. Spend more time talking about solutions than problems.
16. Follow-up with progress reports.

4 tips:

Optimism is essential when giving constructive feedback. You need to believe they can improve.

Avoid giving feedback until you believe growth is possible. What would it take to believe that? Maybe better, more specific feedback.

If growth isn’t possible, redesign their job or manage them out.

Sit on the same side of the table, when possible.

What have you learned about giving constructive feedback?

What do leaders do wrong when giving feedback?

Still curious:

3 Ways to Give Feedback that Works

Here’s a snippet of this article:

#1 Check intentions.

Feedback that works serves the interests of recipients.

Before giving feedback, ask, “How does this feedback serve the best interest of the recipient?”

Wrong motives for giving feedback:

1. Frustration with low performance.
2. Getting something off your chest.
3. Trying to fix people.
4. Beating resistance into conformity. Compliance can be coerced, but you can’t force people to change.

Feedback: Solving the Most Common Failure in Leadership

Here’s a snippet of this article:

5 reasons leaders don’t seek feedback:

1. Ignorance. You don’t know how.
2. Fear. You fear looking human.
3. Overconfidence. You have arrived.
4. Lack of opportunity. You can’t find someone to tell you the truth. If all the feedback you receive is positive someone is lying or everyone is ignorant.
5. Lack of time.

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Humility and self-reflection strengthen leaders for the battle. Click here to check out, The Vagrant: The Inner Journey of Leadership. It’s a wonderful tool for leaders facing challenges.

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Previously Published on leadershipfreak with Creative Commons License

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