Originally appeared at BuzzFeed
1. There! I did it. I took off his diaper.
2. Holy shit. We are officially potty training.
3. Things just got real up in here.
4. I need to catch my breath.
5. Why is this so nerve wracking?
6. Because he’s like a loaded gun that could go off at any moment, that’s why.
7. A gun loaded with pee.
8. Which, I suppose, would be called a piss-tol.
9. Heh.
10. Nice one, me.
11. Let’s see… We’ve now been at this, uh, eight… nine… ten seconds. Ten seconds and no pee!
12. You know what? I think this is going to work.
13. Why does everyone say potty training is so hard?
14. Because, really, it’s not that hard.
15. You just have to commit to doing it, and…
16. Wait. Where’s he going?
17. Oh no. He’s headed toward the couch.
18. No, no, no, no. Don’t sit on the new couch. Please, please, please. Don’t –
19. He sat on the new couch.
20. I probably should’ve Googled how to clean pee off a new couch before we started this.
21. Look at that. We just passed a minute and still no pee!
22. I think this just might work.
23. Wait. Why is he wiggling like that?
24. NOOOOOO!!!!!!
25. Make that “almost” new couch.
25. Now I really wish I’d Googled how to clean pee off a new couch.
26. Okay. Back to square one. New underwear.
27. Speaking of underwear, I wonder if I washed enough pairs?
28. The potty training article said to wash twenty pairs, which I thought was overkill, but now I’m not so sure since we’re already onto our second pair of underwear after just 90 seconds.
29. Why do they call it a “pair” of underwear anyway, when it’s just one underwear? That’s weird, right?
30. I wonder why that never occurred to me before.
To read 65 more thoughts every parent has while potty training, head over to BuzzFeed for a laugh, a cry (probably) and ultimately a victory.