4 Simple Questions to Find the Right Partner

Question 1: Am I Sexually Attracted To Him/Her?

The only thing separating a friend from a boyfriend/girlfriend is sexual attraction.

If you date someone you weren’t initially sexually attracted to, it will end up poorly. Trust me, I tell you that by experience.

If you date someone because, after a certain amount of time, you figured out they had a great personality and “they weren’t that bad…”, it’s a road to misery.

You will get triggered every single time someone you find really attractive enters your perimeter. Leading to a sensation of frustration and growing resentment toward a partner who doesn’t deserve this.

Plus, the temptation to cheat will be omnipresent and will make you feel like shit.

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Question 2: How Does He/She Make Me Feel?

Critical point.

Look.

We all want attractive people around us, to some extent.

Trophy men/women are ego-flattering, and boost your self-confidence and social status.

However, be aware of one thing:

Sometimes, the most beautiful things lead to the greatest falls.

Having a stunning partner (the famous 10/10) might put you under constant stress, always worrying if you’re enough to deserve it.

Jealousy, self-doubt, anxiety…

Not only you may experience negative feelings.

You might also lose sight of your goals, worrying too much about preserving your relationships.

And if your relationship becomes more important than your goals, it’s game over.

Your personal goals should always stay essential to you, and relationships should not occupy too much mental space.

Being relaxed and chill about it is the best option.

Or you might become a control freak.

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Question 3: Can I Deal Well With His Personality Traits?

What fits well with you?

The question is not only :

“What you do you like?”.

But rather :

“What works well with you ?”.

Let me give you an example.

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I dated a very attractive woman.

I thought she was hot. But our vibe was just too different. Even though I’m very sociable and I care about social games, it wasn’t on the same level as her interest in those things.

She wouldn’t be as adventurous as me, and wouldn’t seek escape from our comfort zone. To me, she seemed mundane.

Obviously, we ultimately went our separate ways.

PS: Remember, nobody’s perfect. Try to find the only flaws you cannot accept.

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Second example. I dated a smart chick. She was studying medicine, and I’d never been as intellectually stimulated before. It was delightful. I appreciated every single second of it.

However, despite the intellectual nurturing side of the relationship, I sometimes felt a lack of support. She was so passionate about her career that my feelings or any negative sh*t I would have to deal with wouldn’t matter.

The thing is, she expected me to be a reliable shoulder to cry on during a crisis (which is totally fine, I believe a partner should be a solid pillar of your support system).

However, she maybe felt she wasn’t supposed to assume this equal role for me.

I figured out that even if I crave intellectual stimulation, the best complement to me is a supportive partner.

Her being intellectually very stimulating might be the greatest bonus, but not vital.

I could deal with a lower (YET DECENT) amount of intellectual stimulation if there is a sense of great support.

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