5 Ways Progressive Dating Makes Me Uncomfortable

I have tried to shake some of my traditional beliefs about love, dating, and relationships. It has not been easy. Many of these expectations and views started with romance novels and rom-com movies.

I see plenty of situations from my perspective. Don’t we all. After writing the article below, someone said they would like it if women were more active for once.

I agree with his sentiment. But there are some progressive couple behaviors and situations I am yet to wrap my mind around. One day, we as a society might declare some dating habits as gender-neutral. Until such time, we may cringe a lot more. As we adjust to seeing lovers do what works for them in public.

Here are five couple situations that make me uncomfortable.

1. Servitude in Public

It is weird how men are okay with serving themselves at buffets. Then, they go to a venue. All the other men have plates prepared by their partners. And now sharing out their food themselves becomes a problem.

2. Who Asks For The Hand In Marriage

There is a feeling I can’t shake when women get down on one knee. It is a cross between second-hand embarrassment and cringe. I can’t shake it. But it is necessary for women who want to take the reins of their relationship. Plus, it takes the pressure off the man.

This feeling might be from Sandra Bullock (Margaret Tate) getting down on one knee in The Proposal.

Sandra Bullock (Margaret Tate) getting down on one knee in The Proposal | YouTube

But for me, at least. I am uncomfortable with public proposals, no matter who proposes. I always think, what if the person says no? Forget about me, the onlooker. I can only hope you ask about marriage if you feel ready.

3. Dating to Avoid Loneliness

I used to think everyone dates for love, marriage, and babies. Now, I know people go on dates for all kinds of reasons. I also know people start relationships while feeling indifferent about the experience.

No one has their life figured out. Fine. But why do people mirror the chaos of their personal or professional life in their love life? It is not fair to the next person. Avoiding loneliness isn’t about intimacy. Any human in a similar situation can provide the companionship you seek.

Your partner does not have to be your everything. Why do we believe this? Several supportive contacts are okay.

Instead, we date to find that special someone. And hope they fill our every need. The outcome would be different if you found out who you are and where you belong first. So you can enjoy being in a relationship with that intimate person.

4. Red carpet affection

I don’t know who started it or why the trend has not died. But I find tongue licking unappealing. Yet, so many couples now do it at red carpet events.

Image credit: Getty Images

5. Babies

I would love it if workplaces gave men paternity leave. It is fantastic how involved men are with children when they are around from the baby stage.

It makes me cringe when families are progressive. But get sabotaged by office policies. It rubs me the wrong way when chores cannot get shared. Why? Because one partner stays home and the other one works all the time.

And why do people push past the discomfort only to ask newlyweds this one question? “When are you going to have a baby?”

Thank you for reading (and watching)!

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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.

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