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Dating today is far more than just having casual fun for a couple of hours with someone you have an initial connection with. These days, dating is an interview process to determine whether the person is a good fit into your personal, professional, and social realm of public status.
Most of us used to abide by cumbersome “rules” such as, women shouldn’t make the first phone call to a guy, or don’t order the most expensive meal on the menu, only order soup and salad so he won’t see that you are a real person with an appetite. Remember how there were certain questions a guy shouldn’t ask—like about her age? My favorite is, never kiss him on the first date (maybe on the cheek) but not more than that.
Well, I’m here to tell you to forget about the old rules of the game! Step into 2018 with some confidence and play by your own rules when participating in the dating game.
Rules…sm-uules! It pays to date your way!
#1 Rule to Lose: Do away with the “wait three days to call” rule.
Who cares? No one does! If you’ve exchanged phone numbers, the whole point is to call. There obviously is an interest between the two of you, so why not get a jump start with exploring your connection.
#2 Rule to Lose: The guy should always pick up the tab.
Women today are extremely successful, independent, liberal, and financially capable of treating a guy out to breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a drink. So why not do it? I say go for it! Please don’t misunderstand. I’m not in any way suggesting that a woman should be the primary “paymaster” when spending time with a man. Chivalry is alive and well. The fact is, most decent men wouldn’t allow it. However, it certainly makes for an attractive gesture when she offers to take him out for an evening. This shows a man that she understands that the relationship not simply about her, but it’s all about him too. Men love this! It makes him want to give so much more.
#3 Rule to Lose: “Oh, I’m sorry, I’m busy this weekend” but, the truth is you’re not!
If you’re not busy, and the guy wants to take you out, why not go? This rule is so ancient and misunderstood. Listen, if a guy wants to take you out and you tell him you’re busy, trust me it doesn’t make him want you more. It makes him feel more like you’re not that interested, therefore, he’s more likely to back off instead of pursue. “Mr. Right” just disappeared on the other side of the dial tone.
#4 Rule to Lose: No kisses on the first date.
Who made up this rule? There’s no feeling like spending the evening with someone new…conversing, laughing, sharing, and connecting. By the end of the date, you’re completely enamored with the person standing before you. There’s an electric energy between you and you want to give a heartfelt “thank you” for an amazing evening that is sealed with a kiss. A first kiss is a natural spontaneous moment where two people are paralyzed in a flash of time, embrace it.
#5 Rule to Lose: Only the two of you can hang out on the first date.
I don’t think so! A group date, in my opinion, is the best avenue to take. Each of you can gather up a few good friends and all of you have some fun together. This totally takes the pressure off of both of you and allows you to casually get to know each other without any expectations. This is a great way to test and possibly mesh social circles.
#6 Rule to Lose: You should always dress to impress.
Of course it’s natural for women to want to look their best when gracing a man with their beauty. However, just be you and dress to fit the occasion. Guys are simple and actually, it’s obvious to him when you’re trying to impress him with your outfit or over-accessorized earrings, bangles, and suitcase for a purse. Just be comfortable and exude a soft sexiness with a sweet perfume. I guarantee you he will be memorized by you for the entire evening.
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Photo credit: Getty Images