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Inevitably, you’ve heard mentioned, “he [or she] has a chip on their shoulder.” The phrase “carry that chip on your shoulder” dates back to US shipyards back in the late 1800s. Men would literally carry a wood chip on their shoulder, daring someone to knock it off to instigate a fight.
An example from the Long Island Telegraph newspaper printed on May 20th, 1830, wrote:
When two churlish boys were determined to fight, a chip would be placed on the shoulder of one, and the other demanded to knock it off at his peril.
Fast forward to the multi-platform media age of today. You hear “chip on your shoulder” a lot, especially in professional sports broadcasting, spewing from the notable windbags on Fox Sports and ESPN. The phrase equates to this: Because you were somehow dismissed in the past, you now have something to prove.
Throughout the 2017 NFL season, sports commentators repeated, “Tom Brady has that chip on his shoulder…” WTF. Give that up. Yes, Tom was draft pick #199 in the 6th round of the 2000 NFL draft by the New England Patriots. That “chip on Tom’s shoulder” masks as the cynical euphemism for his dedication for greater. Oh, please.
In various interviews, Tom admitted that, at the beginning of his career, he felt he had something to prove. He didn’t whine. He just worked his ass off. His opportunity arose when he replaced starter Drew Bledsoe. He went on to win his first of 5 Super Bowls in 2001. Yet, ESPN talking heads still regurgitate his “chip on his shoulder”. Utter nonsense.
Tom asks, “What are you willing to do, and what you willing to give up to be your very best?” He gets the bigger picture. Tom is the greatest quarterback to ever play the game. Yet, for him, it was never about being the greatest. For Tom: Be greater than what he knows himself to be. Nothing about a chip.
Greater is the internal game worth playing. Tom lost Super Bowl 2018. Right now, he trains for his next shot, Super Bowl 2019. That is his next greater than. He is greater than.
Greater isn’t about proving others wrong or proving that you’re better than someone. Greater is about overcoming oneself. O-Sensei said, “True victory is victory over oneself.” Kobe Bryant said that greater is about “getting out of your own way.” And this applies to more than just playing sports. Perhaps, life.
I began Aikido because I wanted to be strong. I’m small, and everyone is bigger and stronger. Aikido uses the other’s force, matching up with that, and redirecting that force against your attacker. O-Sensei invented Aikido for the smaller man like himself against the bigger stronger opponent or opponents. Sensei Dan made me aware of this on the path.
Sure, in the beginning, I had to “prove” myself. Still, Sensei listened for the greater me. He constantly said, “Make it work.” Sensei reminded me that growth in Aikido was the internal game. I had to make Aikido work for me. For no one else. That I become greater.
Under his guidance, I experienced the greater than me. I experienced freedom. Yeah, it’s kind of cool sometimes when others call me a “badass”. Not very often. In the bigger picture, it was never about being better than others or kicking ass. Aikido is the possibility of the greater me and greater others.
On Sunday morning, Sensei Bobby had me training with 10-year-old Mariko. We were doing kokyunage “breath throw” from the two hand grab of the wrist. I said, “Don’t look at me. Look where you’re throwing.” She stopped thinking about what to do. Followed direction. She just did it.
Bobby had Mariko train with me continuously, until she was way beyond tired. She got that she was stronger than she knew.
After class, I told her Dad, “She’s getting strong.” I made a fist pointing to my heart. He smiled. Before he left, he said, “Thank you, Jon, for helping her out.” I nodded, “No problem.” His daughter discovered her own greater than. That made practice worthwhile. It’s what I live for.
Discard that chip on your shoulder, if indeed you do have one. Let it go. Train hard. Discover the greater within. You might even surprise you. Keep training for greater regardless. There’s no endgame, only the journey.
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Photo credit: Flickr
Lisa, I love the photo! Awesome.
I’m glad you like it! Sometimes, it’s hard to find a pic to summarize the idea of a post.