Yesterday I had a falling out with my neighbor, won’t go into the specifics. When I explained myself, she started with “Sorry, but…”
NOTE: Sorry’s have no “buts”
We must not get confused between a “Justification” and an “Apology”
A true apology must contain an admission of fault, when you add buts, you automatically remove the admission.
I called her out on this and was thrown out of her house.
Next time someone apologizes with Sorry/But… Stand up, because it’s your right to also refuse an apology if it’s not a real one.
Also, “Sorry/But” loosely translates to — Sorry to hear about your sh$t! It’s not an apology AT ALL!
I understand that when people want to apologize, they might also feel the need to explain their behavior but ensure that this explanation is an Addendum to the apology and NOT sneakily changing the apology to a justification.
Why am I hammering on this? Because so often we allow people to get away with their behavior as if explaining their actions makes it right.
Just because you explain yourself, DOES NOT make your actions right.
Defend your right to a proper apology, and don’t let people throw you “Justifications” that are masquerading as “Apologies”
The End.
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Photo credit: Peter Steiner 🇨🇭 1973 on Unsplash
