How do I get more comfortable with toys & stuff in the bedroom? Intimacy Expert, Allana Pratt has some naughty and nice ideas…
Question: I know this will sound really unusual (I think), but I’m not into experimenting in the bedroom and my girlfriend is. She wants to use toys and stuff, I’m just not comfortable. How can I get comfortable because I don’t want this to affect our relationship?
Answer: First you are totally badass for sitting in the fire and asking me this question. You rock.
Second, I’m curious what you are making toys/experimenting ‘mean.’ Have you decided toys mean you are inadequate? Or that you are dirty and bad or your girlfriend is dirty and bad? That it’s not pure, normal, sacred or intimate? Is it just that they are new and you don’t have the hang of them yet so you’re afraid of failing, being rejected or feeling silly?
Also, have you asked what toys mean to your girlfriend? Perhaps does she think you are SO AWESOME and she feels SO SAFE that she can TOTALLY BE HERSELF and it’s a complement that she wants to use them with you? Does it make her feel more beautiful, naughty, empowered? Have you asked?
Instead of contracting, I would expand, open, take a breath and start asking questions from a place of curiosity knowing YOU ROCK and ALL IS WELL and SOMETHING AMAZING IS ABOUT TO BE REVEALED.
If these toys, great man, are triggering your sexual shame, there is a big cost to not handling it, for shame grows when light isn’t shines upon it. Lean into the discomfort with a masterful professional like myself and heal this place if this is what’s going on. It will save this relationship and take it to new heights and depths… but only if YOU are healed inside to the core. Many of us including me have been shamed for our sexual desires and once free from these debilitating ‘curses’, love making truly becomes a sacred spiritual place of true unapologetic self expression… coming home to the magnificence of YOU!
Should that be the case, the first place I discuss sexual shame is in my complementary report www.GetHerToSayYes.com, the 2nd would be in my 2 ebook/audio product Scoring a Relationship in Book 1, and the third would be connecting with me personal for a powerful strategy session by contacting [email protected]
I can’t wait to hear of your freedom, confidence and JOY in the bedroom with your special lady… Huge love, Allana xoox