Marriage Has Lost Its Significance

I’ve struggled to see the need for marriage. But I’m torn.

I know marriage is worth it. How? Respect. Women value rings — the feedback is kinder to the primary (married) female partner if the guy cheats. Institutions also acknowledge official unions. Only wives or ex-wives get the flag if their partner dies during service. Otherwise, it goes to the mother.

Financial safety. You keep a roof over your head during the union. That’s pretty much it. Or it could be the internet coloring my opinions. I would love to know what you think. But this year and beyond, marriage lost its significance.

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It’s not a fair space.

You’ve seen the trend by now. Women hover a ring over their finger. They go from fabulous to a maid.

When you read the comments, the replies are not supportive. Housework is the reason women allegedly stay single. Meanwhile, guys think they dodged an “unreal” one. They describe her as a high-maintenance woman who doesn’t want to be like their loving mom. But fair play in relationships is essential.

Women need to know — the guy they choose will help or see housework as a full-time contribution.

The financial beneficiary changed.

Women lose more than men these days.

My neighbor is afraid to go through with her divorce. She will lose plenty. Today, I’ll call her Denise. She has two houses, a car, a job, and zero kids. The man she married lived with his parent. He gave her the impression he was working to improve his life. If she goes through with the divorce, he could get half of the life she built.

Instead, they remain separated. Denise hopes the distance annuls the marriage. So, she doesn’t have to give him half the wealth she spent her entire life amassing.

The afterlife doesn’t age well.

Courthouse unions last longer than the overpriced ceremonies.

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What do younger generations want?

They want Pinterest weddings with a cheap price tag. We’ll be seeing more separations in 10 years. People aren’t evaluating partners enough like they do when they try to get venues for less.

It was always about the greens.

Marriage helps men and women go further. But in today’s world, you and I are super independent. You value your physical privacy and personal space. You don’t want to live with someone because you like your room untouched, the way you designed it.

Married people will tell you how they relied on each other to build their wealth. Afterward, they split and look for younger partners.

Women and men who can get ahead without intimate partnerships choose to go it alone. And to avoid my neighbor’s demise, they stay unhitched.

It’s an odd win.

Some duos are better off as co-parents. Sharing spaces, a last name, and finances blinded partners from their core responsibility. Each had a duty to be wonderful parents.

The distance led to clarity and healthier environments for the kids. I was once like you. Saying you should have known the guy you laid down with, and there were signs. But men change their minds, too. Even (planned) children suddenly aren’t wanted when life isn’t going great financially.

Minds change.

And one party has the clarity to call it quits amicably. Sometimes, a new parent comes along and fills the gap. But it doesn’t occur often.

It’s okay.

Men and women are trying to find healthy ways to love each other conditionally.

You need the freedom to explore, pick a person, and choose again with fewer consequences. While the falling marriage rates seem awful, it shows we value our emotional health more.

And when you’re emotionally healthy, your relationship stands a better chance. So, don’t care about the global numbers.

Care about your stats. Is your relationship worth locking down? Even if it is, you don’t have to get married — it’s enough to know you pick each other daily.

And if you worry about stability. You and your partner can get a will or legal contract to divide assets.

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Thank you for reading this post.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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