One post that attempts to help you find what you’re looking for.
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The above screenshot is a list of the searches that brought people to The Good Men Project website at a certain point in time this past weekend.
An eclectic mix of topics to be sure.
It got us thinking, “What if there were one post that attempted to answer all your questions?!”
This is that post.
And away we go, from the bottom up:
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10. Moral code has it become OK to cheat?
This is a sweeping question. We did do this post once—crowdsourced, so actually YOU did it for us—called 31 Reasons Why Men Don’t Cheat.
It resonated with a lot of people. It might not tell you that it’s OK to cheat, but it does say that a lot of men believe it is OK not to cheat.
9. Love
It makes the world go ’round. As they say.
All at once, the question—if it’s a question at all—is unclear, but it’s also the only question that seems to matter.
As Aaron Neville and Linda Rondstadt once said, “I don’t know much…but I know I love you…and that would be all I need to know:”
What we do know is this:
- It is transformative: “We are transformed not by being loved, but by loving.” ― St. Paul.
- It is extraordinary. Or can be: “Unless it’s mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it’s a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldn’t be one of them.” ― Dreams for an Insomniac
- It makes you feel kind of funny inside: “When I saw her I was in love with her. Everything turned over inside of me.” ― Ernest Hemingway
8. How to know that your girlfriend sleeps with you only?
This one…Well. I’m not sure.
Be good to her. Be kind. Connect.
See #9.
7. How to be the loving boyfriend of a gay man?
The same as the loving boyfriend of a straight woman. Or the loving girlfriend of a lesbian woman. Or the loving girlfriend of a straight man. Or any other combination you can dream up.
How to be loving doesn’t change depending on sexual identity or orientation. And if you’ve got it – if you are generous and caring – you’re going to be in pretty good shape.
6. How men fell [sic] when you disrespect them?
We feel bad. Truly.
5. How long does it take to . . . an 18 month relationship?
OK, so there is some ambiguity to the question here. And the missing word is?
We’re thinking it could be one of two things.
If we are asking, “How long does it take to get into an 18 month relationship,” the answer is pretty straightforward: about a year and a half.
But if we’re asking—gulp—“How long it takes to end such a relationship?” (#sadface), the answer is not very long at all. While the momentum—positive or negative—of the status quo can be a powerful thing, relationships are fragile.
It can end quickly.
4. Breaking down stigma of male depression
How to break down the stigma of male depression? Good question.
To start with, by talking about it. By sharing our stories. We’ve all got them. As they say, just about everyone is fighting a battle that you know nothing about. Until you do. So how to change? By changing. Talking about depression in men does not have to be stigmatizing. Or depressing.
We do it here in I May Be Crazy (But It Just May Be a Lunatic You’re Looking For, here in When ‘Smile’ is the Worst Thing To Say, and here in Depression. A Part of the Human Condition. And if you want more you can just search our site–
Oh wait. That’s how this whole thing got started . . . We may get stuck in some sort of endless loop. On to the dirty elephant joke . . .
3. Elephant jokes dirty
Yeah, I’m dying to know how that one ends too.
But that wasn’t the question. So here is your (somewhat) dirty elephant joke:
Q: What did the elephant say to a naked man?
A: Hey that’s cute, but can you breath through it?
Thank you. We’ll be here all week. (Try the veal . . . .)
2. Can being addicted to porn ruin your sex life?
There are different schools of thought on porn in general.
Here is one, arguing that being addicted to porn can ruin your marriage and relationships.
But to answer a different question, here is another take, which argues that porn can help couples build sexual trust. For the record, a real addiction to anything is generally bad, porn included.
1. (Not provided).
Well. If you aren’t providing us with your question, how on earth can we be expected answer it?
Throw us a bone here.
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Photo Credit: The Good Men Project
And if you liked that, you might also enjoy these random musings and projects, also by Mike Kasdan:
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The Singular Wisdom of Both Not Giving a F*ck and Totally Giving a F*ck (At The Same Time)
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Good Men Project Sports Fills the ‘Blank Space’ In Your Hearts and Minds
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Good Men Project Sports’ ‘Why We Run’ Series: Call for Submissions
Why thank you! 🙂
Good post. Just the right balance between helpful and funny. Thank you.