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When the adversarial nature of the Family Court apparatus is in full gear — framing the “Mom vs Dad” case — trauma from parental alienation often plays out with some of the worst type of damage obstructing family bonds.
The psychological manipulation targets the most innocent individual — the one falling in between the “v” and “s” of Mom “vs” Dad — the child. In this way a child can show signs of disrespect, fear and irrational anger towards the targeted parent or family member. This results in the relationship and bond deteriorating over time and often to a point where a parent and many family members lose the ability to communicate, visit and be a part of that child’s life — in other words they become erased.
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A Reality For Judge
Tamra Judge, of the Real Housewives of Orange County reality TV program, is featured in a newly released Public Service Announcement that debuted at a recent fundraising gala for the upcoming documentary film Erasing Family — whereby she added her voice to the many people worldwide whom identify as being erased.
At the dinner, Judge commented about how speaking out on the issue led her to discover many other erased mothers, fathers, and children — realizing how vast the problem is in these ordeals.
Speaking with family members at her side, Judge said,
“I am determined to help other families who are going through this, it is important to know that you are not alone. Children are taught to hate, love your children more than you hate your ex. Children deserve to have both parents in their life.”
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Erasing Family Documentary
Ginger Gentile, a documentary filmmaker, is shining a light onto the obstructing forces that play a role in harming the bond that exists between children — their fathers — mothers — siblings and extended families.
“I don’t want any child to suffer from their parent’s divorce as I did.” —DIRECTOR GINGER GENTILE
The upcoming film Erasing Family, the follow-up to the documentary Erasing Dad that Gentile directed, will focus on the devastating impact inflicted when parental alienation pulls apart families. It will feature several interviews and share the alienation as experienced through the most innocent victims — the children.
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Hoping to promote reform in family court, Gentile would like to bring national attention to what is becoming an increasing public health epidemic saying, “the documentary aims at promoting increased awareness of this traumatic issue of court-ordered family separations. Studies show that prolonged child trauma often causes negative health outcomes.”
Once the film is released, Gentile believes it will garner an initial wave of heightened focus on family courts and the inability — sometimes outright refusal — by them to improve adverse outcomes for families that often stem from legal separations.
“Just because the child says she doesn’t want to see them, or the other parent makes an accusation, the courts quickly erase a parent, thus robbing them of their identities. Resources should be spent on healing — not prolonging — family conflict.” —DIRECTOR GINGER GENTILE
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Awareness and Education
Clinical Psychologist and Parental Alienation Expert, Dr. Craig Childress, attended the gala and commented on social media saying,
“At this event, the movie’s director showed rough cuts of some of their filming to date, stories told by targeted parents and by their now reunited children. Most powerful were the statements by the now-reunited children. Strong stuff. Good stuff. This is exactly the professional grade documentary that needs to get made. They need funding. They need our support.”
As awareness of parental alienation continues to attract more attention worldwide — many efforts have taken root to educate the public and professionals who deal directly with this dilemma. Dr. Childress will be featured as one of several experts to speak at an upcoming symposium where Wendy Perry, Co-Founder of Parental Alienation Awareness Organization USA, has led efforts in coordinating this event.
It is geared towards providing strategies and solutions for the many professionals working in the legal, education, health and other industries that directly interact with families effected. In this way, the symposium aims to bring together and promote synergies between educators, behavioral health providers, protective services, social services, law enforcement, juvenile justice professionals and parents.
The Parental Alienation Symposium 2017: Solutions for Professionals and Families takes place on April 29, 2017 in Dallas, Texas.
Wendy and her husband Robert Perry, are currently working on a documentary film where one of the subjects of focus is the story of Rod McCall who lost his son under the most tragic of circumstances and shares his experience in the book he authored, For The Love Of Eryk.
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Light And Reunification
Erased family members often wrestle with the trauma and emotional seesaw that fluctuates between depression — anger — periods of despair — feeling like they are caught in a never-ending cycle and finding it hard to see light at the end of the tunnel.
The increased efforts put forth by active individuals and groups seeking reforms and reunifying erased victims with their families — bringing these issues out in the open by providing awareness, education and support — offer optimism and hope that light will finally come for the many people feeling the impact of parental alienation in these divorce and custody ordeals — feeling lost in a broken system.
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This post was originally published on the author’s Huffington Post blog as is republished here with his permission.
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Photo credit: screenshot from ErasingFamily.org’s video
I’m mother who is going through the exact same situation with my son I was reunited with his sister my daughter 3 years ago at that point he felt that I broke up his home and his life that he knew but the living situation that they were living in was not a good living situation so I took my daughter in my son has made threats on my life threats on my family life and has not wanted to have anything to do with with me at all the courts do not see it in my favor at all… Read more »
I am a mother who has not seen her daughter , my only daughter in a little over a year , we were going to court even tho we have been divorced for years my exs girlfriend got exstremley controling leaving me no choice but to co parent with her , when sexual allegations from my 6 year old aroise about her and her father I immediately jumped to services that can help depleteing my funds on attorneys exc. I just want to know if there is some one out there that can help me on what I should do… Read more »
This documentary perpetuates the pseudoscience of alienation of affection, which hurts protective and more nurturing parents. Parents who have been abusive to kids use this concept of alienation as a way to escape accountability, blaming their difficult relationship with the child on the other parent who is complaining about maltreatment. It’s important to recognize the way this word and unscientific theory is being used/abused and to avoid it. We all know parents do things to excommunicate the child but reformulations of PAS are not scientific based, are thrown around loosely, discredit kids, and most kids who are hurt by it’s… Read more »
I pray the schools and courts start taking this seriously. I also pray there isnt a parent request form to show this psa in school. I watch my husband deal with this daily. With his silence you see the pain. His entire family was erased. Grandmother, Aunts, and cousins. Very sad to see. I believe if the parents that do this were to be told by a judge all support payments stop until this situation is rectified that we would see more children having continued relationships with both families. This is child abuse.
This is pure Child Abuse! Evil ones will surely pay. Thank you for this article. God Bless You
Love reading your words on this issue, Stephen.
This one gave me a chuckle seeing that you led with a story of mother alienation.
I remember saying, jokingly, some 30 years ago, that it will only change when women begin to lose suffer the fate that so many dad’s have, never thinking that it would come to fruition.
I don’t care, just saying, the means will justify the end, and like you, I look forward to a day when this nonsense is just a bad dream, and no parent is alienated from a child simply because they divorced.
DJ, as a woman and an alienated Mom forced to pay child support, I just gotta say that I had no idea of what Dads had been going through over the decades when they were expected to pay spousal and child support and maybe see their children every now and then. As a parent who lost custody of our daughter 14 years ago and who is fighting against being erased, I get it. I also get that the psycho-legal system was set up to pit Dads and Moms against each other. We are court-ordered to “get along”, ironically, with narcissistic… Read more »
I just want to say how remarkable it is how far this is come. Five or ten years ago parental alienation was dismissed as mra nonsense. But now that alienated women are starting to speak up its just amazing how seriously this is being taken. Don’t get me wrong its great that parental alienation is being brought up in hopes of addressing it. But I can’t help but notice the stark contrast between how its regarded now vs how it was regarded then and all that has changed is that women are adding their voices to the mix. There lessons… Read more »
What feminist snake oil saleswomen never told women when they were selling them that old jalopy, that it was destined to break down and leave them stranded also. You should have heard the accusations leveled at dads that sought to be, well, dads after divorce. I can remember going round and round with Trish Wilson and her gang over accusations that men just wanted to use custody to abuse their wives and get out of paying support. They were never about women, just used women as a shield…and this is where it has landed. Sucks, hate seeing it come down… Read more »
Which is funny because feminists are always going on about how “If men suffered (issue that primarily affects women) then it would be fixed instantly.”. But here is a real world example of “If women suffered (issue that primarily affects men)…” and they are silent.
Remember when you go to court, it’s not about Your right to the child…. the court don’t care about you, your rights or your drama… it’s about your child’s right to both parents. I was separated from my Daughter for 23 months. When the court tried to give me an every other weekend schedule I refused it ” I am not here to visit my Daughter, I am here to raise her. ” I was given weekly visits a few times a week. Almost two years after the court gave Mom the “option” to cause paid for visits and told… Read more »
please help me by signing my petition to pass equal time sharing in florida , Gov Scott vetoed the last bill pandering to the family law attorneys making $$$$ off of broken homes and children
please help ,, and somsnowboarder is right its about children rights to have both parents ,,, I don’t need my kids they need me ,, my time is for them
Awesome! That’s true parental love! Thank you.