Dating apps have revolutionized the way people find and connect with potential romantic partners, making it easier and more convenient than ever before.
Within one tap and one swipe, you can find the love of your life or the person you’ll spend the rest of your night with.
However, this convenience and ease of use may also come with some unintended consequences.
To be more precise, consequences regarding the motivation of finding a new partner and the reward system of relationships.
Truly problematic if you ask me.
Recent studies have shown the presence of depression, anxiety, and stress for users of swipe-based dating apps.
You’re NOT motivated to find the right partner!
With a seemingly endless stream of potential partners at our fingertips, it can be easy to be content and less motivated to put in the effort to actively search for the right partner.
This can lead to a sense of apathy and a decreased drive to form meaningful relationships.
As shown in studies, a whopping 22% of Tinder users were married whereas 44% were in a relationship!
Do you know what’s even crazier?
Research has found specific personality traits in swiping-based dating apps — such as sensation-seeking, sexual permissiveness, and anxious attachment — which are extreme red flags.
We also need to keep in mind how accessible are potential partners on dating apps, which can also impact the reward system of relationships.
The grass is always greener on the other side.
When we have access to so many potential partners, it can be tempting to continuously search for someone better or to keep our options open.
This can lead to a lack of commitment and an inability to fully invest in a single relationship.
It’s pretty obvious that this leads to issues in trust and commitment between partners.
It’s easier to engage in casual relationships and keep our options open, leading to a reduction in trust and commitment.
This can result in a lack of investment in relationships and a decrease in their longevity.
The sweet, sweet instant gratification
The swiping mechanism used by many dating apps can also contribute to a decrease in the reward system of relationships and overall of the person using them.
This mechanism can create a sense of instant gratification, where users are rewarded with the feeling of finding a match, but it may not necessarily lead to long-term satisfaction or meaningful relationships.
It’s very important to acknowledge which activities and apps provide this instant gratification, so we can learn how to manage ourselves and our reactions to it.
Studies show that the more we indulge in this instant gratification habit through the swiping mechanism, the more we adopt compulsive behaviors.
The more compulsive behaviors we have, the easier for us to lose focus on important aspects of our lives, and the easier it is to end up obese or with financial burdens.
It’s science.
The stress of the perfect profile.
With the ability to carefully curate our profiles and present ourselves in the best light possible, Photoshopping our weaknesses, and using a ton of filters to boost our appearance can create pressure to constantly present a perfect image.
Since everyone is using those tools, it’s way easier for us to go down the Kim Kardashian rabbit hole — as I like to call it.
This can lead to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem, as well as unrealistic expectations for potential partners.
Which is extremely toxic.
You can’t interact with people like in the good old days.
After deleting the biggest dating apps in the world — Instagram and Tik Tok — I can safely say that flirting and trying to find a romantic partner with a cold approach is almost impossible nowadays.
And swiping-based dating apps aren’t making it any easier since you can stay home and browse baddies/chads from the comfort of your couch.
In the last couple of months, I conducted a social experiment of approaching people at bars.
Oh my lord, it’s like everyone from the age of 20–30 has lost all of their social and flirting skills.
You can make fun of me, but I truly think dating apps and social media have destroyed healthy interactions between young people.
In conclusion (TL;DR)
Come on man, don’t prove me right. It’s a nice article that I’ve put a lot of effort into, scroll back up and read it. I’m sure you’ll like it.
Say no to quick dopamine hits.
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS. Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
Compliments Men Want to Hear More Often | Relationships Aren’t Easy, But They’re Worth It | The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex | ..A Man’s Kiss Tells You Everything |
—–
Photo credit: charlesdeluvio on Unsplash