Uneasy Male Emotions

A lesson that everyone learns at some point in their lives is that men also can feel powerful emotions in a variety of situations. These events can cause us to feel deep sadness, loneliness, anger (of course), shame, guilt, or deep grief over a loss of friendship/relationship.

A huge obstacle is that most of us aren’t taught how to express these emotions in a healthy way — without a mental chain in our heads (often from negative past experiences) keeping us from expressing any emotion other than stoicism. Remember when we were kids and we felt sad about something or wanted to cry? We weren’t allowed to express that, we had to bottle our emotions up and be stoic after being chastised by our parents/guardians.

If you had stoic parents, this could have been a big issue in your home. Maybe it got to the point where you had to be on eggshells with your emotions because of unfeeling parents.

As time goes on, the problem gets worse with young men having a lot of bottled-up emotions from disappointments that we go through throughout our lives.

One day, years down the line, all of the emotions and pain that we hold inside finally come out, only in a heated argument with family or a friend.

It feels good to release that hot air inside of our bodies, at the same time, we feel shame for letting those emotions out due to our programming of not being able to show our vulnerability.

Men pay the price for not being able to let out their emotions in a healthy way. The important people in their lives also are affected by this complex issue.

It’s a tough road to go through. It wouldn’t be necessary if men were encouraged to express their grievances from when they’re kids. Some are given the freedom to be that way, but, most don’t have that luxury when they’re younger.

It’s still a struggle for me personally when I get frustrated & angry when things aren’t going my way or I’m having a bad day.

I get into that habit of bottling it up if I’m around plenty of people. But, when I get home, my emotions come out, it’s so freezing to release those heavy emotions out of my system.

The process has been a non-stop challenge. There have been signs of improvement, but, I have a long way to go as most men do.

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Previously Published on medium

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