Unpopular Opinion: I Still Think Everyone Is a Good Person

Three years ago, I wrote an article about how I thought everyone is a good person. Not that many people read it, and it didn’t seem too controversial.

Now, I want to reiterate that point, even though that belief has been battle-tested by three years of experience, a world that seems to have gone up in flames through a pandemic that killed countless people, unprecedented far-right challenges to democracy, and civil unrest and a reckoning with the country’s racist history and present.

You are living through it too, so you understand the belief that “everyone is a good person” is going to be a lot more controversial today than it was three years ago. It’s going to be a lot more unpopular.

As a member on the side of the political left, my peers are going to rebut with incredibly valid critiques: do I think Donald Trump is a good person? Do I think members of the Proud Boys are good people? Do I think KKK members are good people? Do I think George Chauvin, who killed George Floyd, or the five cops who killed Tyre Nichols are good people? Do I think Hitler was a good person? Do I think mass shooters are good people?

Well, the conception that everyone is a good person differentiates between people’s actions, beliefs, and who they are fundamentally as people. I spoke with a colleague a couple of days ago about the way adults can talk about students with emotional disabilities. We are both special educators, but she also made sure to make the differentiation. The kids might have done X or Y that made the lives of peers or the lives of a teacher very difficult, but she made sure to say the kids aren’t bad kids: they may have just done a bad thing, like everyone at some point has.

Of course, thinking “everyone is a good person” can mean playing a bit of mental gymnastics. There are still consequences for doing bad things. And some sins are worse than others.

I don’t mean to get overly religious, but part of the Christian faith is believing that everyone is deserving of grace. I’m a lot more private about my faith than I used to be, but I think seeing the good in everyone is essential, even if you don’t want to.

In the past few years, I’ve really had the conception of everyone as a good person challenged. In terms of ethics and faith, that belief is one thing. But in the real world when people do terrible things that adversely impact you, that mindset is, at best, hopefully naive, and at worst, incredibly privileged and something that can very much be taken advantage of.

And I have been taken advantage of, in the past, by always thinking and assuming the best of people. I’ve told people very vulnerable details about my life and experiences that have not been kept in confidence and have been used against me in some manner. I’ve put my trust in people I shouldn’t have.

During my first year of teaching, I thought being nice and showing unconditional kindness to kids who were bullies would eventually wear them out of treating their classmates horribly. That tactic backfired and was completely wrong.

I’m only touching the surface of times I thought people were inherently good people and that their good and redeeming attributes would outshine their bad, only to be wrong. Rather, I should say people’s actions still may not have been the best actions in those situations.

But I do think everyone is a very complicated person. There are times we are generous, magnanimous, and kind. There are times when we are self-preserving, selfish, and borderline cruel. We all have capabilities for actions that hurt a lot of people, and actions that help a lot of people.

I say I still think everyone is a good person because, at a certain level, I do think we need to divorce someone’s actions and beliefs from their actual character. We do live in an era where one thing you did or said 10 years ago can define you, especially if it goes viral on social media. And that’s a very difficult environment and climate to say everyone is a good person and not face serious backlash and repercussions for it.

If we don’t believe everyone is a good person, then where is the capacity of a person for rehabilitation, reform, and growth? If we don’t believe there is good in ourselves, how can we work towards being better people every day?

Perhaps I should revise my statement from “everyone is a good person” to “everyone can be a good person,” but at this moment, I won’t. On my end, it might just be blind, naive faith at this point — I still think everyone is a good person.

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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.

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