I had a conversation with a literally good man who wants to make a difference in the world. He’s a bit on the introverted side and has some things going on in his life that are negatively impacting his confidence. In particular, he’s overweight, and believes this fact will make people unwilling to listen to him and take him seriously.
As a guy who is also carrying around some extra pounds and has experienced social repercussions, I can relate. You might say it’s a sad state of affairs when well-intentioned people can be beaten down by pressure to conform to certain expectations. But I’d like us to do more than shake our heads at the “cruelty of the world.” As I suggested in my discussion with the good man, social negativity can be seen as a gift. It is an invitation to overcome one’s own inner critic as well as the doubts of others.
You see, too many of us who want to be change agents are often inflicted with impostor syndrome. It’s that insidious voice from within that asks “who do you think you are, trying to achieve this goal? Don’t you know you’re not good enough?” Unfortunately, if we’re not mindful, we internalize what we believe the world will say about us if we dare step into the lime light.
If you’re struggling with impostor syndrome, let me offer you two considerations I hope will help you break free.
Consider Who’s the Real Impostor
I have to admit, I get pretty upset when an empathetic person seeking to make the world a better place tells me they feel like an impostor. This gets to me because so many guys are possessed by a shallow egocentrism encouraged by our current level of technology. They labor under the illusory belief that they’re supremely self-sufficient physically, mentally, and emotionally. Our culture of convenience and plenty has lulled too many men into a smug self-assurance.
So, I ask, who is the real impostor? Someone who has communicated with others with genuine vulnerability in order to make a real connection, trying to make the world a better place? Or those who still wear the masks society has forced upon them, living unfulfilling lives behind facades of brittle egos?
Do It As You Are Now
If you’re feeling like you want to challenge yourself and do something more with your life, don’t wait to start taking action. If there’s something you want to do that benefits others, start doing something about it now. Even if it’s baby steps, keep moving forward in the direction of your goals.
Don’t wait until you reach some standard that you think the world wants you to meet. Whether it’s a certain weight, a level of income, or a specific degree or certification, you shouldn’t chain yourself to some future condition and let it keep you in stasis. Stop waiting for the “right” time, place, and situation before you take action. Do it as you are now!
You don’t have to be Tony Robbins to make a difference in the world. The size of your impact on the world isn’t what matters; the only thing that matters is the fact that you want to make things better. When the inner critic asks you “who are you to think you can make a difference,” consider this: with how desperate the world is for people to step up and inspire us to help each other, who are you to deny the world your enthusiasm and empathy? How irresponsible is it to let the voices, both within and without, keep you from fulfilling your potential?
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