As my friends suggested, I’ve installed a dating app for the first time in my life. I never looked for someone to have sex with, since I was not ready neither for serious relationships nor for becoming a girl who sleeps with everybody. The second thing never helped me out and only made things more complicated, so I focused on flirt and dates.
The Great Wow
The first day I had my Tinder account created I felt like I’ve opened a new universe. So many people were liking my profile. I received like 740 likes during the first day only, so I was tired of swiping and talking. However, the conversion was quite a law — 1 normal guy on 100 those who liked me. Among them, only half texted me and only 2 guys I’ve chosen to go for a walk with.
The next day and the day after I kept on receiving likes. 700 likes per day were normal for me, so the number of people I talked to was growing as well. Unfortunately, “the wow effect” lasted for three days only.
Then The Bell Rang
You know that moment when a boy can look pretty cool, have nice photos and even seem to have same hobbies as yours, but worth it to start talking everything breaks into thousand pieces? That’s what exactly was happening over and over again.
I have my own UI/UX design company, speak 6 languages and travel a lot. Moreover, I’m well-educated and good-looking as well. And I never thought it can be a reason for abuse!
30% of man who texted me were wondering how can 22-years old girl have her own business. “You must have a daddy, yes?” Or “you travel because boys pay for your trips?”. All these abuses were spinning around my account and only causing a strong feeling of great disappointment in people.
Another reason why the “wow effect” was broken is that one or another day good accounts come to an end and you no longer see interesting people around you. There are fewer and fewer people, fewer and fewer likes and in two weeks on Tinder, you find yourself in the middle of the empty supermarket, where you still didn’t find something you were looking for.
Broken Pink Glasses
Many girls are fans of dating apps. It’s a wonderful and simple way to find someone for the night (people use Pure now for that) or someone to get attention from. But if you are even tried successful girl, you should stay away from such places.
“I don’t have a job”
“I’m looking for myself”
“I have never been abroad and don’t want to”
“I’m looking for someone to sleep with only”
These are daily emails in your dating app account. When a man doesn’t abuse you for simply being cool, they tell you about their unsuccessful life and blame you for being different.
The world I thought to be a celebration box with confetti turned out to be a bottomless acid lake where everything normal and interesting dies in few days. Since all adequate boys I’ve met were leaving Tinder as soon as they could. Empty talks and flirt may make your weekdays not that lonely — that’s what most people think. But in fact, talking to numerous empty people without anything interesting in mind they can share with you only leads to the progressing feeling of inner loneliness and completely lost. Some women even claim they agree to close eyes at some bad habits or features that irritated them in man after sitting in dating apps. Because when you see no one normal around you start to put the quality bar lower and lower. And finally, come to the bottom — a happy place where all these men live.
So be careful and don’t lose yourself — live real life and meet people in real. There are numerous ways to meet interesting and cool guys outside of dating apps. Use them! And stop this long way down to the bottom of the acid lake.
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Previously Published on medium
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Photo credit: iStock
