I wasnāt always infatuated with yoga.
In fact, I hated yogaā¦until I loved yoga.
My frustration with yoga began because it kept rudely pointing out all of the things I couldnāt do, like touching my toes. Iāve been blessed with super tight hamstrings and a lower back that refuses to budge.
I was certain yoga was mocking me whenever I attempted to straighten my back in down dog. And then there was the pain. I was only in my early thirties when it first started. I noticed extreme stiffness upon awakening and muscle and joint pain all day long.
How I First Met Yoga
This is where my yoga love story starts. I first met yoga at Highland Spring Resort in Cherry Valley, California. When I was seven years old, my parents would take me and my older brothers to this all-inclusive summer resort. This was one of those places that offered tons of fun for the family; horseback riding, swimming, hayrides, and my dadās favorite offering of all ā all meals included!
They also offered daily yoga classes on the lawn. Bright and early, my dad and I would rise and shine and head to a yoga class where we would do Sun Salutations to greet the sun, āHello Sun!ā. I liked it.
I was a quirky kid who enjoyed communicating with nature anyway, so I was already accustomed to speaking to trees and clouds, so why not the sun? Also, I liked āyoga peopleā they felt happy and familiar. But spending a week or so each summer in Cherry Valley does not a practice make.
Fast forward a couple of decadesā¦
What do you know ā my old pal, yoga, shows up all over the place in a more mainstream kind of way. At gyms, in parks, and on peopleās minds. I stuck my toe in once again, that toe that I still couldnāt touch.
I was good at other thingsā¦ martial arts, tennis, swimming, I even enjoyed the whole Tae Bo craze. But yoga, I just wasnāt any good at it. And that little fact right there developed deeply seated issues between yoga and me. I developed resentment and contempt whenever we met on the mat.
Saying hello to the sun just wasnāt enough for me anymore.
It wasnāt until someone suggested I take teacherās training when things got even stranger. I did take the teacherās training. Six months of Kundalini yoga and meditation training. I told myself that I was āin it for the mantras.ā
I enjoy chanting and singing those pretty mantra songs, they make me feel good. So I figured Iād just power through the yoga part, to get to the good-feeling part. After I graduated, I even taught a few classes with a friend. He taught the yoga section and I wrapped up the class with meditation.
Youād think that after all of that that I would have finally declared myself and yoga an official item. Nope! I stopped teaching and then went several months without teaching or practicing.
How Yoga Became a Daily Must for Me
So how did it happen? How am I today, as I type this, a devoted yogini through and through? A yogini who never, ever misses a day of yoga? How did I get here?
That persistent pain calledā¦ pain. A lot of it. It was Muscular pain throughout my body. I love to work-out but all of my workouts werenāt working out. In fact, they caused me even more pain.
One day, while visiting my aging mom, I was caught off guard while watching her walk. She was struggling with her balance and aches and pains to such a degree it seemed that a wheelchair would soon be in her future. She did a lot of sitting and not a lot of moving and now, she can barely walk.
A meditation chime went off in my brain and the next sentence I heard was, It doesnāt have to be this way for you.
Finding Healing in Yoga
I immediately found a yoga teacher online and found a thirty-minute Vinyasa on youtube. It was a Hatha mix with some fast and some slow movements. I started immediately. I began to do this every single day, never missing a day. I even took my travel mat to Italy and never missed a day while I was traveling.
Within six months, my pain was gone. Not āa little improvedā but GONE. I also toned-up and lost a few pounds. I felt better, stronger, and more like myself. It turned out that my old friend, yoga, was always with me. Yoga was just waiting for me to be ready.
I never miss a day of my home practice, I take weekly group classes, I have yoga Pinterest boards, yoga is all over my subconscious and conscious mind now. I am comfortable coming out and saying this loud and proud,
Yoga, I am hopelessly in love with you.
I feel fortunate to have discovered yoga for myself againā¦
And again.
And again.
And again.
I finally realized that yoga is not about touching my toes. Itās about the journey I take with my own mind, heart, spirit, and body.
Itās about showing up and loving myself enough to take that time on the mat each day
to
truly
be
Published initially in Do You Yoga
āļøThe Ćber Annie-link to all the Annie-links: āļø
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Previously published on medium
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Photo credit: Photo of the author, anniewood. Photo by Peter Arpesella, artwork by the author