Number 6 in a Series
Think of a time when you felt the blissful ecstasy of being heart-connected and in the “flow”, and remember how long it lasted.
Although there are many ways to experience the ecstasy of being in the flow, all of them are momentary and transitory. When I lose my heart-connection, instead of the relaxed, openness of being totally present in the moment, fear and tension have taken me out of the moment. Once I realize that I’ve lost my heart-connection there are a number of things I can do to center myself and regain it.
The simplest way is to stop what I’m doing and take a deep breath (or 2, or 3, or more). Very often that’s enough to feel the tension drain from my body as I return to my center. I see the situation differently and I’m open to learning something new about the situation.
At other times, when I need more than a few breaths, I temporarily withdraw from the situation. This does not mean using the time away to avoid the situation. It’s a time to regain my center. I might find a quiet place to allow my feelings to spontaneously flow by yelling and/or pounding them out, or freely writing them out without worrying about making sense or being grammatically correct. Once I’ve regained my heart-connection I can return to the situation in a totally different state of mind.
Other ways to regain my oneness might include formal meditation, writing in my journal, sitting and listening to a favorite piece of calming music, or dancing in rhythm to music that centers me. At other times, I might engage in some kind of physical activity such as running around the block or playing with my cute little dog.
Sometimes, before being able to return to center I may have to more fully express my heartless feelings and then after returning to my heart, learn more about the beliefs and fears, such as anger and/or blame, that fueled my disconnection.
Reconnecting with my heart is like what I believe Jesus meant when he said to “turn the other cheek.” Many people interpret this to mean that if someone slaps you upside your head you’re supposed to turn your head and allow them to hit you on the other cheek. Although I don’t pretend to know what Jesus meant, for me, turning the other cheek simply means seeing things from a different perspective.
I know that I’ve regained my heart-connection when my energy shifts to feeling compassion and being open to learning about myself, the other person and the situation at hand. The energy of being open and heart-connected feels completely different from being closed and disconnected from my heart. (For a more in-depth look at the difference between heartfelt and heartless behavior and feelings, click on #2 in this series, How to Become Your Own Hero: Stay Heart-Connected in the Face of Difficulties .)
For Your Journey
- There are many ways to center yourself and none of them are the right ways or the best ways. The only thing that’s important is finding what works to help you attain a state of serenity and openness. (If you have not found ways to center yourself, try seeking suggestions from others.)
- What do you need to do to become aware that you have disconnected from your heart?
- What do you need to do to shorten the time it takes you to become aware when you are disconnected?
- Share-it-forward. Share with another person what you’re learning about reconnecting to heart.
First in the Series: Live Joyfully: Get Out of Your Head
Next Week: # 7- Heartfelt Sharing Creates Delicious Emotional Intimacy
BECOMING YOUR OWN HERO illuminates a path available to us all to attain the kind of personal power demonstrated by our most revered and inspirational heroes. Marianne Williamson, #1 New York Times best-selling author said, “I highly recommend this illuminating and touching look into the possibilities of staying connected to our hearts, even when facing difficult situations.”
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Inspirational method of staying connected, and returning after disconnection, and when the transcendence work has been done.
Life is difficult (M Scott Peck) and we are often nearly tipped out of our boat, and sometimes actually are thrown out as we are forced to avoid the obstacles between us and the shore, and navigating the rough storms that ensue while we attempt to reach the safety of dry land without falling out of the boat.