Rejection sucks.
It doesn’t really matter what kind of rejection it is.
Maybe your crush doesn’t return your texts. Or maybe if she does she lets you know that she can’t spend time with you because she has to organize her plastic container collection every night for the rest of forever.
ProTip: Gentlemen, that’s a hard “NO!” She’s not into you. Let it go.
Maybe you didn’t get the job or promotion you wanted because the company went with someone else.
Maybe you auditioned for a band, a play, or some kind of creative endeavor only to be rejected.
“You’re great,” they said. “It’s just not the right fit.”
And though you may understand the rejection intellectually, it still hurts.
Because you weren’t good enough.
And there’s nothing I can say to make rejection easier. But I can help you to keep keeping on.
First, look at the rejection.
What was it?
Was it your crush blowing you off?
Well, what did you want from this interaction?
Was it friendship? Intimacy? A spouse to procreate and build a family with? A life partner? Someone to bang the living hell out of you?
All of this is fine. As usual, I’m not here to judge, and the heart wants what the heart wants.
But look at whatever it is that you wanted yet failed to procure or create. Is that goal, that desire, worth suffering for? Because if it’s not, if it’s not worth that much, then I’d just let it go. And find something else to think about or something else to do.
Give up. That’s right.
Because you don’t want it bad enough.
Or, you can keep going. And continue to try to forge relationships with people who are looking for the same things as you. And you’ll probably be rejected again.
And again.
But you’ll keep going because that’s what you do. Because that thing you want, that relationship, that job is worth suffering rejection for.
And if you finally do land the job or the show, or if a crush says, “I have to organize my plastic containers, but I’d love it if you’d come over and keep me company while I do it,” the suffering of the previous rejections will have been worth it.
And what else do you have to do, really?
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This post has been republished to Medium.
Photo by Mark Alexandrovich on Unsplash