Today I’m metaphorically hooking you up with a guy that I got to know shortly after launching Sex and the Single Dad in 2009. To be honest, it was the name, Father Muskrat, that drew me in but the writing keeps me coming back for more.
If these questions sound random it’s because they are. Every single question relates to something on Father Muskrat’s blog. Seriously. All the randomness is courtesy of a dude that I’m happy to count as one of my peeps. I would take a bullet for the guy and I’m pretty certain that he has my back.
[I wouldn’t take a bullet in the torso, but maybe the arm. Preferably something that will go straight through and not leave a huge hole.]
When you’re finished here, be sure to check out what he has to say on his blog.
Did you seriously wiz on the IRS sign? [If so, fist bump bro.]
Are you talking about this picture?
Well, it was winter 2006, and I’d been deployed to Andrews Air Force base for 6 months. I decided we’d get up early on a Sunday morning to do some site seeing around the National Mall, but first…I wanted to create a picture of myself pissing on the IRS. We (my wife and I) waited until there was no one around (again, it’s early Sunday morning, and all good politicians go to church, as all good tourists sleep in). I was scared (but not shitless), but I walked up to the side of the building, pulled out my dong, and let it fly. The rest is infamy.
Has your wife ever forgotten the secret word in public and told you to “Shut the F up?”
Since filling out house with children, I’ve actually cut down on my inappropriate musings (both in person and online, actually), so this has not been as big a necessity as it was several years ago. You have to remember that when I started this blog, I’d JUST gotten back from my second deployment to Iraq. I was not the same person I am today.
How did the whole “lotions in the basket” thing work out? Did she call the FBI?
She thought that was pretty messed up, honestly. Especially when I staged the photo with a hose in our garage. She said something like, “You always laugh about that scene, but you do realize it’s not a funny scene AT ALL, don’t you?” And then I remind her that I think things are funny that normal people may not find funny at all. So there.
How exactly does “idiosyncratic juxtaposition” turn you on?
This observation was one actually made by my wife: ie, that I pull odd stories, people, events, etc. together while telling an amusing story or writing an amusing post. So, I guess I’m turned on “creatively” by such. A good example is my last post about my bidet, in which I conjure images of the little boy living under the Ghost of Christmas Present’s robe and Tom Cruise’s character in “Magnolia” among a story about my dirty asshole and the credibility of Crocodile Dundee. See how that works?
Is it just me or is the phrase, “Practicing law” stupid? You guys went to school long enough that you should be performing and not practicing.
[Feel free to share this at your next bar meting when it’s time for “Stupid shit that non-lawyers say”]
For my first several years, I was absolutely “practicing” law, but now I have a decent handle on what I’m doing. It only took 8+ years, too! What really frightens me is when I go to a urologist who’s “practicing” medicine with my balls.
Where do dad bloggers fit when looking at the global picture? Should we be compared to Mom Bloggers? Are we just dumbasses or do we have legit shit to say?
Wow…this is an enormous can of shit (because the can of worms has been emptied and examined far too many times at blogging conferences like the highly enjoyable Dad 2.0 Summit or M3 Summit), and it’s been addressed by more knowledgeable and eloquent dudes than I’ll ever profess to be. But my take is this: yes, we got shit to say, but we’ll never have the marketing clout that moms have. And you know what? That’s fine with me.
What’s next for Father Muskrat? Are there new adventures to be had or new places to find your witty-yet-insightful prose?
It’s hard to say. I’ve loved writing at DadCentric, where Jason lets us have free reign when choosing our content, and my prose (ha!) can have a wider audience. I sometimes think of making my personal blog more about dad blogging and less about my drinking exploits when I travel. Like you, I’m not really in a niche. I used to think it was “humor blogging” when I was featured on Rob Kroese’s website before he took it down, but now I just share a bit of what’s going on in my life. Hell, it’s fun!
Is there anything I forgot or something you want to share? Do you want to thank the members of the Academy?
Actually, the Academy can go fuck itself for dissing Clark Gable in 1939.
Now that you’re hip to what the Muskrat is all about, scurry on over to his blog, FatherMuskrat.com, or catch him pontificating on Twitter. Be sure to tell him I sent you.
Subscribe so you can keep up with all the good stuff at Reed My Writing. Tomorrow is another tasty Daddio’s Diner and Thursday is Happy Hour with the one and only Chopper Papa, A.K.A. Kyle Bradford, talking about Spring Break.
Oh no! I actually sat on an IRS sign in DC, flashing the bird at it for a picture. I hope and PRAY that I didn’t sit on the one you pissed on.
Mad respect for your middle east T.O.D. and it’s. Ice to see someone have Clark Gable’s back.
Looking forward to checking out your blog
@TheMuse word…..
@TheMuse It’s okay. My urine has magical powers AND is totally sterile!
Also, is there more than one sign? I was at the actual IRS building near the national mall. I suppose both sides are labeled; I was on the side facing the mall.
@MoeDaniels Greeaat… That’s where I was! Sterile or not, I sat and took a picture with your dried whiz. I feel like we’ve bonded…
All true, I’m sure of it.
@whipstitch
I’m not sure what’s true and what’s not but they’re his words, so what the hell.
That was the most beautiful interview addressing urinating on a Federal building that I’ve ever read. Probably.
@TwoBusy Thank you. Probably.
Thanks for the props and the stage, JR!
@MoeDaniels No. Thank YOU. I’m honored to know you. [That sounds like I’m blowing smoke, but I’m not.]