There’s this funny meme being passed around on social media about friendship break-ups being harder on an individual than a significant other break-up. This is not a lie.
Friendships surpass in emotion any other relationship. Why do I think this? When any relationship has ended poorly or tore my heart up, I always fall into my best friend. When the world is too much and you just need to escape, you call your best friend and you sit together and ignore the rest of the world. They are your go-to. Hell, I have a couple of friends that are married and their husbands call their best friends during their “fall apart” moments. Not because the husband can’t handle it, but because there is more comfort in having your best friend there.
Best Friends experience the world differently together. I remember having a couple of down days in my past and the arrival of my best friend changed the entire outlook of my day. The world seemed much brighter with their presence.
Best Friends know things about you that no one else has the luxury of knowing. Your friends know the good, the bad and the ugly about you. They can tell horrendous stories about the things they’ve seen your body do. Do they tell a soul? Never, unless it’s at the expense of a laugh from a retelling of the story from both of you.
Now, I know what your thinking. My husband/wife is my best friend. I don’t need friends because I have them.
If this truly is how you feel, then you are a unicorn in a sea of normal horses. You have hit the lottery of relationships. It is rare to meet someone that you are in love with and you can call your best friend. It’s not common. Some people spend all of their lives searching for that treasure.
The only response have for those in this wonderful relationship is I hope you’re right. Some people like to put up a façade to everyone on the outside. They want the world to think that they are perfect and that they’ve found what everyone else wants. Unfortunately, most people use this cover up to mask their unhappiness in their relationship. They don’t want to admit that they don’t want to admit that their relationship lacks this. For you, my friend, I am sorry and wish I could instill a large amount of my strength into you.
You Deserve Better.
Most of the couples I know of in my life have their spouses and then they have their best friends. There is a balance between the relationship and the friendships. I also feel like the friendships in some people’s lives strengthen and help their relationships with spouses. I also have seen the toxicity from both the relationship and friendships of people. It’s sad.
Friendships are special. If you have a friend that has been in your life for years, they’ve seen the ups and downs of your dating adventures. They have seen you act your worst and they’ve also seen you at your best. I hate to admit this, but they may also know you better than you know yourself. They cry with you, laugh with you and sometimes just share silence with you. They were most likely there before your spouse and don’t deserve to be pushed to the side.
HOLD ONTO THOSE GREAT FRIENDSHIPS.
A marriage or relationship with another is just the next chapter in your life. Your best friend has been there from the beginning. Share your happiness and involve them in the process of this next step you take.
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
You Might Also Like These From The Good Men Project
Compliments Men Want to Hear More Often | Relationships Aren’t Easy, But They’re Worth It | The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex | ..A Man’s Kiss Tells You Everything |
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—
Photo credit: Toa Heftiba on Unsplash