There are many ways for a man to measure his success as a father. For William L. Walker, it came down to whose kids got the coolest treehouse.

Treehouse Envy

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About William Lucas Walker

William Lucas Walker is an Emmy Award-winning writer and producer whose television credits include Frasier, Will & Grace and Roseanne. He co-created the critically-acclaimed Showtime comedy The Chris Isaak Show. He and his husband Kelly are the parents of Elizabeth and James, born in 2001 and 2005. The children were gratified by the legal marriage of their parents in 2008, an event that rescued them from a life of ruinous bastardry.
Spilled Milk follows WLW's adventures in Daddyland. It is the first recurring humor column by an LGBT parent to appear in a mainstream national publication. Spilled Milk has been regularly promoted to Featured Blog status on HuffPo's front page, as well as in the Politics, Comedy, Parenting, Huff/Post50 and Gay Voices sections. New columns are published monthly.
Follow on Twitter: @WmLucasWalker, @SpilledMilkWLW or Facebook: "Spilled Milk" by William Lucas Walker.


  1. Anthony Zarat says:

    My sons have a 44 foot pirate ship treehouse with two normal slides, a circular water slide, a climbing rope, a climbing wall, a rock wall, a sand box, a swing, three decks, two pirate flags, two staircases, and a captain’s cabin that we can all sleep in (with a relief tube!) In September we hoste an annual “pirate day” party for the neighborhood children (complete with pinhata busting!)

    My wife thinks I am crazy for building the thing. She is probably right. The town regularly harasses us for a laundry list of code violations. Fortunatly, government is very inefficient. When when I am finally forced to chop the thing down, my sons will be in colege.

    • …The town regularly harasses us for a laundry list of code violations. Fortunatly, government is very inefficient. When when I am finally forced to chop the thing down, my sons will be in college.

      hehe, great post

  2. When Kelly announced his plan to build steps leading from the back yard down the hill, to make access to the treehouse safer and easier, the kids’ reaction was merciless and swift.
    “No!” cried Elizabeth. “It’s way more fun to go down on the rope.”
    “Yeah, no steps!” yelled James. “We like sliding down on our butts!”
    Jack and Jill. I could not have been more proud.

    thats so cute :)
    another finefine article, lovely photos too.

    as this piece is in the family section, if the following is not acceptable then mods pls delete:
    if that ‘hotdaddy’ photo is of the malboro man, then one has to wonder what was going on back then ;)
    as that, to my eyes is clearly an erotic photo

  3. We had a large lot when my kids were growing up but didn’t have the “perfect trees” for a tree house. Nonetheless, we put something together that they liked. Of course being in an evolving upper class neighborhood, the things we did around our property didn’t sit well with the neighbors.

    I’m a perfectionist and one thing I had to learn was that as long as it was safe, the kids (boy and girl) had to be the ones building it. Oh yeah, I had great plans but this became their project. In my eyes, it looked like crap but in their eyes, the tree house was perfect. Where we had a make shift tree house, my neighbors would buy these elaborate play house / swing / monkey bar structures. My kids weren’t interested in those structures, they had their own that they built (had a hand in building)

    I think parents live vicariously through their kids … recreate our own childhood and I think that’s a great thing.

    Now if ya ever want to talk snow slides in the back yard, give me a call.


  1. [...] rights and custody battles? Well, guess what. They do so because they want nothing more than to build more treehouses with their sons before it’s too late. I was talking to a feminist about why custody battles were so important and he said “well, [...]

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