A List of Stupid Things I Have Done Whilst Biking

Bicycle Fall

---Photo lindeh/Flickr

Josh Bowman Lists Some of the Stupidest Things He Has Done on a Bicycle

Note: I learned to ride a bicycle later in life (i.e. in my 20’s), and have had to catch up on making bad choices in a very short period of time. I am not proud of these choices, but I have learned a lot of lessons, and I vow someday to become a proper grownup.

  1. When I first started riding, I was terrified of traffic, so every time a car came towards me, I would pull my bicycle to the side. On a couple of occasions, I would bump the tire into the side of a car. It was beyond embarrassing.
  2. I got really into riding my bike in Vancouver, so much so that I decided I could ride all year ’round! One day, it snowed and ice formed on the road. I bailed on my bike at least three times and skinned my knees riding to work that day. Remember, I was in my 20’s.
  3. When you ride a bicycle, for some reason, you think that you can safely drink and bike and it’s no big deal. So…I have gotten drunk and ridden my bicycle home, swerving this way and that. It’s a miracle I never got hit by a car on the road.
  4. I got a new road bike in Toronto, and thought it would be fun to stand and move around on that bike going downhill over speedbumps. The bike totally flipped, I fell on the asphalt, and ruined a good pair of jeans. Today, those jeans serve as a reminder not to be pointlessly reckless on a bike when going downhill over speedbumps.
  5. Talking on a phone. Texting. Talking on a phone while looking up an address. Watching a music video on my phone with headphones on.
  6. Riding against traffic on a one-way street at night.
  7. Standing on the frame with my feet off the pedals. Actually, that was pretty cool.
  8. Carrying an amplifier in a backpack on my back, and a guitar in one of the side panniers, cables in the other.
  9. Trying to squeeze between a huge truck and a parked car. Those drivers were not happy.
  10. Taking micro-naps while riding. 5 second blinks!

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About Josh Bowman

Josh Bowman is a professional fundraiser, story-teller, comedian, and blogger. He has worked and consulted in Vancouver, New York, and now Toronto for almost a decade. Josh improvises around Toronto, including regular shows with Opening Night Theatre, and also blogs for the Huffington Post. You can email Josh or follow him on Twitter. If you want to submit a guestpost or know more about Josh, check this post and this post out first.

Comments

  1. Lisa Hickey says:

    This brings back memories — I used to bike to work through the city, Cambridge, Boston. I also used to do performance swing dancing. I was running late to work, grabbed my swing dancing costume in a bag, and for some reason held onto it in one hand while biking instead of putting it in a backpack. At a spot of construction where the traffic merged into one lane and the road was dug up, I stubbornly rode through. Hit a part of the dug up road, couldn’t catch my balance because of the bag in one hand, and…splat. Broke my thumb, and was laying there on the ground with my thumb high in the air because it hurt so much. A bus rumbled by, and I know people were looking at me saying “what is that woman doing lying on top of her bike giving us the thumbs up sign?”

    I still danced that night, ridiculously big cast on my hand and all.

    Thanks for the memory. I bike everywhere I can.

  2. I once properly fell asleep on my bike when I was working an insane rehearsal schedule and averaging around three hours sleep a night. I was on a quiet residential street and it was so peaceful and there were no cars and I sort of zoned out, next thing I topple over sideways and I’m sprawled out on the road with my knee and elbow pumping blood.

  3. Oh damn, could a mod please edit the comment above, I did NOT mean to put my email instead of my name!

  4. Biking in the winter is entirely practical, but takes experience. Come to Copenhagen – 1000s of people do it every day, and yeah, we get real snow.

    if you live in a place with consistently icy roads, you can get spiked winter tires. I’ve seen students bike to class on Spitsbergen, in -30 degC ;-)

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